You (Jhobea)

Chapter 38

BEA

After nung eksena sa condo ni Jho kinailangan kong maglabas ng sama ng loob. I called dad at nakiusap na siya muna ang bahala kay Ben for tonight. Ayoko namang umuwi doon ng lasing. I explained to him kung anong nangyari and he understands naman. Sinabi lang niya na wag masyadong uminom and that when I am ready kausapin ng maayos si Jho. Para magkaintindihan daw kami. Kahit kailan talaga boto si daddy kay Jho.

I called Ria to meet me sa bar. Mejo nauna na ako ng ilang shots ng tequila when she arrived.

"Uy Bei! Andami na niyan ah." Sabi ni Ria.

"Ri, I wanna drown my pain with alcohol. Akala ko kasi okay na ako. Akala ko okay na kami ni Jhoana."

"Bakit ano bang nangyari?" Tanong niya.

"I thought we had an understanding. Kahit hindi namin napag-usapan halata naman sa actions namin na okay na kami. But then, last Friday it came to a scenario na kailangan niyang mamili between me and that guy she is constantly linked with." Ininom ko yung shot ko at humingi ng isa pa sa bartender.

"Ah yung Nico. I heard nga about that incident sa gym. It doesn't look good for Jho pare."

"Well yun na nga. It wouldnt have been that messed up if Nico didn't make a scene. Now it came to a point na kailangan niyang mamili and she chose to go with Nico. Hindi ako makapaniwala and I was so overwhelmed with emotions. Buti nga nakarating pa ako ng buhay sa Tarlac eh."

"Parang nagflashback yung nangyari dati with Rex. Naramdaman ko na naman na hindi ako sapat para sa kanya. Na if given a choice, she would choose some guy over me. Natakot ako coz I cannot afford to be broken like the last time. You know I cannot afford to mess up like the last time. I have Ben now. Priority ko parin ang anak ko Ri. Pero ang sakit sakit lang." Pagpapatuloy ko.

"I understand Bei. Maski siguro ako ganyan ang magiging reaction. Did you talk to her about it? Napag-usapan niyo na ba yung nangyari dati?" Tanong ni Ria.

"We talked about the past but only about the child we lost and our mistakes in the past. Hindi ko na sinabi kung ano ang nangyari sa akin after that. She doesn't know about the suicide attempt and all the horrible shit I did after we broke up and before I met Ben. I don't think she needs to know anyway."

"So anong plano mo ngayon?"

"Ewan ko Ri. Natatakot ako. Natatakot akong maulit yung dati. Baka hindi ko na kayanin this time."

"Whatever you decide Bei andito lang naman kami ng family mo. And please wag mo na solohin ang problema mo this time."

"Thank you Ri. I know I can count on you."

Uminom at sumayaw lang kami the whole night. After kasi naming mag-usap ay sumunod na si Jessey samin sa bar. She was with some friends din so we partied with them the whole night. I got so wasted and when I was supposed to pass out pero may sumalo sa akin. I couldn't remember who it was sa sobrang kalasingan ko.

When I woke up I was in a very familiar room. I did not want to open my eyes for fear that I may be right. Unfortunately, I have to get up to empty my bladder. Sobrang naiihi na ako plus I have a pounding headache.

I opened my eyes and I was right. Nasa condo ulit ako ni Jho. I looked at the bedside table and saw a a glass of water with a note.

"I went to training. Drink the advil, you'll feel better."
Ps. There is food on the fridge I am sure you're hungry by the time you read this.

Yun lang ang nakalagay sa note. Ininom ko yung gamot and I tried to recall last nights events as I make my way to the bathroom. I found my clothes in the laundry basket next to the bathroom door. When I entered the bathroom, I found another note.