The Badass Was Kidnapped

What is with non living things loving me?

Lots of swearing!

http://www.polyvore.com/cgi/set?id=62306052

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K769dq14bJs

It's alright, he won't kill me, he's my brother, he'll like it. I repeat this in my head as I walk home from the hair salon. I guess my mind wasn't there cause next thing I know I had fallen to the cement sidewalk.
"So we meet again sidewalk...find any cute guys? I have, but he'll never fall for me." I sigh and glance up at who I'd bumped into. Standing in front of me was the Niall Horan with his arm wrapped around a fake blond. "Jess?" He asks looking down at me.
"Oh hi Niall, how are you? Is this your girlfriend? I have to go bye!" I gibber as I bounce up of the ground. Normally I would I run down the road screaming FOR NARNIA!, but for some odd reason, I didn't feel like it. I felt like going home and curling up into a ball while eating cookie dough. I felt as if my heart had been ripped out.

"Wait! Come and join us! Tell us about the guy who'll never fall for you!" Niall says.

"Ew! Why would we want her with us, Babe? I mean she talked to the dirty sidewalk! Like ew! She belongs on the road, like road kill!" Barbie says and I gasp in pain.

"You know what Niall? I think I'll pass have fun with your Barbie!" I smile sweetly before walking towards the apartment...or should I be British and say flat? Nope...I shouldn't be...or should I...no it's still no.

Bumping into a moving wall I pat it's chest and say, "Sorry wall, you're not for me, but the sidewalk looks kind of lonely. God what is with non living things loving me?"

"Um," A voice mutters and pushes me back gentley. "I'm not a wall and as much as I'm a klutz, I don't think I suit the sidewalk." Blushing I glance up through my side bangs at the stranger. Holy Ham this guy was hot!

"Um sorry, I'm just you know um really hyper?" I mumble still blushing.

"It's OK, so um...wanna get a coffee?" He asks. Whoa buddy, a bit forward aren't you?

"Sure," I smile.

"OK, so favorite food?" David asks as we sit in the cafe and sip our hot chocolates. (He doesn't like coffee either.)

"Ham." I reply. "Top 5 favorite artists?"

"The Fray, OneRepublic, The Script, Coldplay and Snow Patrol. Siblings?"

"Um, 1...no! 3." I stutter. "Well 4, but 1 is only my brother by adoption and he's dead so three." I stutter.

"Um?"

"OK, well my brother just found me and was all like I'm gonna kidnap you instead of telling you on the street, and I haven't met my two sisters, but I have two sisters and my adoptive brother was shot trying to save me." I mumble. Did I just tell my life story to a stranger? Yeah, I did. Smooth move!

"Oh um..." He stutters.

"Um, favorite-" I start but I'm cut off by a familiar Irish voice.

"Favorite One direction member and why you're hanging out with my girlfriend." Niall says and I glare at him.

"Um...I don't know and um girlfriend?"

"No, not girlfriend!" I say as Niall says, "Yes girlfriend."

"Oh, um sorry man, I thought she was single." David stutters.

"While you thought wrong." Niall glares.

 "Niall what is wrong with you?" I snap. "Look David, I'll text you later, and he is NOT my boyfriend." I grab my bag from off the table and storm out of the cafe.

"C'mon Jess, don't be mad." Niall says as he storms after me. I was moving so fast I was already infront of their building.

"Don't be mad at you!?!? Niall you just told David I was your girlfriend! I have a right to be mad!" I say as I storm up to the elevator. We argue about as we take to elevator to the top floor and down the hall.

"C'mon Jess! I was doing you a favor!"

(Play Music)

"IN WHAT MIND IS TELLING THE GUY I'M HANGING OUT WITH I'M YOUR GIRLFRIEND DOING ME A FAVOR?" I yell.

"YOU DIDN'T KNOW HIM!" Niall yells back. By now all the guys were standing outside the door. 

"I KNOW MORE ABOUT HIM THAN I KNOW ABOUT ANY OF YOU! I MEAN COME ON! YOU KIDNAPPED ME AND BROUGHT ME TO LONDON WITHOUT EVEN TELLING ME WHAT YOUR FAVORITE COLOR IS! DAVID'S IS GREEN! WHAT'S YOURS NIALL? HUH?"

"WE THOUGHT WE WERE DOING YOU A FAVOR GETTING YOU OUT OF THAT ABUSIVE HOUSEHOLD! LITTLE DID WE KNOW WE WERE MAKING THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF OUR LIFES! NO WONDER THEY ABUSED YOU! THEY COULDN'T STAND YOU JUST LIKE THE BOYS AND I! YOUR OWN BROTHER DOESN'T LIKE YOU! AND YOUR OTHER BROTHER AND FIANCE, IF THEIR EVEN REAL, PROBABLY DIED TO GET AWAY FROM YOU!" Niall yells and I gasp in pain.

"IF YOU GUYS HATE ME SO MUCH WHY AM I HERE! HUH? GOD, TAKE YOU BLOWN UP HEAD OUT OF YOUR ASS AND LOOK AROUND! YOU HAVE MILLIONS OF GIRLS IN LOVE WITH YOU AND YOU DON'T EVEN CARE! YOU ACT LIKE YOU DO CARE IN FRONT OF THE PRESS BUT YOU'VE LET THE FAME GO TO YOUR HEAD! YOUR NOT DOING IT FOR YOUR LOVE OF MUSIC ANYMORE! YOUR DOING IT TO FEEL GOOD! TO FEEL LIKE YOU CAN DO ANYTHING, EVEN BE A DICK! JUST CAUSE YOUR FAMOUS DOESN'T MEAN YOU HAVE THE RIGHT TO RUIN EVERYONES LIFE! GET YOU STUPID HEAD OUT OF YOUR ASS AND LOOK AROUND NIALL HORAN! YOU HAVE DESTROYED EVERYTHING IN YOUR PATH. MILLIONS OF GIRLS LOVE YOU AND YOU DON'T EVEN GIVE A FUCK!" I snap as the guys stare at me in silence. "YOU ASKED WHO I FELL FOR? HERE'S COMES THE CLICHE MOMENT! I FELL FOR A DICK WHO WILL NEVER LOVE ME BACK! I FELL FOR MY BROTHERS BEST FRIEND! FOR A CELEBRITY! FOR A TAKEN GUY! I FELL FOR YOU YOU ASSHOLE!"