Can't Say No (Lil Wayne Story) (UNEDITED)

Chapter 42: Perspectives

Opening my eyes I panicked when I saw the bright light coming into the room and the realization of where I was hit me. Scanning the room I didn't see Wayne, I didn't know if I was relieved or sad. Glancing at the clock I saw it was only a little after 6:30 in the morning. Getting up I went to the restroom before gathering my courage to walk out of the bedroom and face Wayne.

Opening the door I sighed when I saw him asleep on the couch. My purse was on the coffee table in front of him and I walked as slowly as possible until I was directly across from him and reached for my purse grabbing it and clutching onto it like it was my own personal life line. Glancing toward the door I took a step toward it only to pause when I looked back down at Wayne. My heart was conflicted, it was confused and my brain was just as messed up..

Wayne was so peace full when he slept, so innocent. I wanted to believe in him so much, I attempted to take another step but felt guilty just walking out on him again. Glancing back down at him I sighed moving to sit in the chair opposite him. He opened his eyes about scaring me to death, "I was wondering if you could just walk out that door." I frowned at him, I knew I should have bolted when the getting was good but no.

Yawning Wayne sat up stretching, "you hungry?" I shook my head no, "no, I just want to go okay." Wayne sighed, "Okay I can't stop you." I nodded at him standing up watching him warily as he also stood up walking up too me. I froze not moving as his hands found my belly. "Take care of my little man ok." I nodded at him again looking up into his eyes, I barley noticed as he pulled me up against him until it was too late. Laying my head on his chest I paused just listening to his heart beat, the beat that put me to sleep for countless nights. "If you did it just say so."

Wayne pushed me back grabbing my chin to force me to look at him. "If I did it I would have admitted it, I didn't do this." I sighed, I had just wanted this to be over part of me wanted him to be like yeah I did it. Wayne caressed the side of my face, "I will find out what the hell is going on, I mean this shit pisses me off. I feel like we are in fucking jr high, all this he said she said bullshit. I love you and I just wish you would believe the words that are coming from my mouth but I understand why you don't." I looked up at him, "I want to go home."

Wayne looked at me confused, "home, or HOME." I shrugged taking a step back until I was out of his reach. I could feel my tears before they actually feel. "I just want to go home, but I don't have a home anymore. I just want to.... " Wayne took the step putting him back into my reach, "Brynn chill out, you always have a home, and even if it isn't with me I will make sure you and the baby are taken care of." I don't know why put that pissed me off and I pushed him back, "just leave me alone, why the hell can't you get that through your head, I don't want you, I don't want to be with you anymore." Wayne froze and he put his hand down not even trying to stop me as I pushed past him leaving slamming the door.

In the elevator I was beating myself up, I couldn't get Wayne's face out of my mind and damn it if I didn't feel like I was in the wrong for what just happened. When the doors opened in font of me I couldn't make myself get out, instead I found myself going right back up to his floor. This time I didn't pause at his door but I pounded on it half afraid he wouldn't answer. When he did answer he slung the door open, "What Brynn I can't keep doing this with you OK I can't. You don't want to be with me then don't but quit making me think there is a chance to be back with you. I don't have to be with you just because of the baby I'm with you cause I love you but if you don't love me back then let me go."

My mouth must have fell to the ground because I couldn't speak, he was mad, no in fact he was pissed. I frowned at him, I was supposed to be the one mad at him not the other way around. "You think I'm playing you." Wayne turned on me sitting on the couch lighting up a blunt kicking up his feet on the coffee table, "I don't even care anymore."  I took my seat across from him, "so no more trying to make things right." Wayne shrugged, "I don't know, would it even matter." He blew out a cloud of smoke sucking it back in. " Probably not, is it worth it, I don't even know."