The Assasination Game

How the Shit Turns

America, South Korea, his sister North Korea, Russia, Germany, and Japan were all out on the town.
Currently, they were in a small restaurant having a snack.

"So you got grounded?"

"Yeah, our old man went nuts when we got home, and sent us up to our rooms like we were children," America dipped a carrot into his ranch with a short huff.

Russia snickered, "you're lucky. If Soviet was still around, he would bend me over his knee and...how is it said? 'Tanned my hide?'"

"Wow, now that is some old slang. You stuck in the 1920s or something?" America snorted.

"Whatever," Russia muttered, snatching up one of America's apple slices.

"Hey!"

"So how long are you grounded for, Meri-kun?" Japan questioned.

"As said by my dad, I'm, quote-umquote, 'grounded till my bones are more brittle than his leather belts.' All that means is, he's not gonna enforce anything, but I'm in trouble."

"Yikes," South Korea put in.

"No kidding. Hey, you guys want to visit my mom next week?"

"France? Isn't she and Britain going to be out of town next week?"

"No, not her. My other mom, Spain! Phil, you know her!"

Philippines looked up, a spoonful of rice halfway hanging out of his mouth and blinking eyes giving way to the fact that he hadn't been listening.

"Say who--?"

"Spain, my mom."

"Oh! Her! Yeah, I remember her! She hit on me a lot when I was there with you that one time. Uhh, I'm not sure what you want?"

"I'm planning on taking you all to have some food at her house. She said she's wants to cook for you guys."

"Uh, she's not gonna be flirting, is she?"

"No, don't worry, she'll probably be distracted by the cooking and her new boyfriend, Portugal."

The Filipino nodded and agreed.

Japan hugged South Korea closed to her and said, "We'll go too! I'm excited to try your mother's cooking!"

"Cool. Oh, and she said she wanted to meet you too, Russia," America said, looking at said Russian.

Both him and Germany choked on their food, but for different reasons.

"Wha-wha-why does she want to meet me??"

"Last time I saw her, I mentioned you to her, and she said she was happy we were getting along, so she wanted to meet you," America shrugged.

Russia stared down at America with a bewildered look.

"W-why did you tell her--?"

Germany stood up in his seat. "JAPANINEEDTOSPEAKTOYOUINPRIVATE," he shouted as he tugged lightly on Japan's sleeve and walked away.

"ごめんなさい(gomen'nasai), I need to see about this," she said politely and bolted from her seat.

She reached the back of the restaurant, where she saw Germany head off to.

"IS THIS PROGRESS??" Germany asked loudly, turning to her.

"I DON'T KNOW, I never seen America so nonchalant about Russia-kun! And his mother! He must have told her something, or she wouldn't have wanted Russia to come so badly!"