Is It Wrong?

Chapter Fourteen

TRIGGER WARNING

*Amanda Lopiccolo - Dark enough*

LISTEN WHILE YOU READ THE 4TH PARAGRAPH

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LOUIS' POV

It's 3AM, everyone is sleeping but me. I decided to look for hateful and hurtful comments about the way I look on twitter, it didn't take long to find a long list of them. I don't know why I look for these tweets and replies but I do.

I have had such a good day today and I don't deserve such a forgiving, loving and well mannered family and band members. I shouldn't even be apart of the world's famous band. But I am and I wouldn't change it for the world but being famous isn't all glam,it's has a dark side to it too, the haters.

No matter what you are famous for or how famous you are,people are going to send you hate, fans call them trolls but I call them 'the truth tellers' because everything they say about you, you can instantly notice the flaw and then you realise how truthful they are being.

I got out of bed and made my way to my bathroom. I removed my bracelets one by one and placed then on the countertop. I then opened the cupboard and took the sparkling blade,which looked clean and I didn't like it that way. I then held my arm over the sink and dragged the blade across it 6 times, wincing each time because of the pain. I watched as the blood oozed out of the new cuts and it made me happy, it made me feel human and alive. But it didn't give me the over powering feeling which I longed to feel; I wanted to feel.

6 cuts didn't do it for me this time, normally 3 was enough to remind me I had control but I did it 6 times and it didn't remind me of anything, I took the blade into my hand once more and dragged the blade across my arm another 4 times. 10 self inflicted cuts were oozing blood and it felt good. It finally felt like I had the control, it finally reminded me that the 'haters' don't control me and that I control me and my life

I waited awhile before I cleaned the cuts and wrapped my arm, from wrist to elbow in a clean bandage then place my bracelets on carefully, making a mental note to buy more later once I have slept.

I quietly walked back into my room and pulled the covers over my body to keep me warm. It took me a while to get to sleep, it must have been around 5am when I fell asleep because when I woke up that afternoon at around 12PM everyone else was wide awake and I was extremely tired.

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