spiderson oneshots

Mr. Mercenary

"Let me get this straight. You want to enlist my help in defeating your threat?"

The room was silent, everyone daring each other to speak.

"Well? I'm waiting?"

"That's... yeah, basically. But you need to understand, this threat is way above any of our leagues."

Peter giggled manically, doubling over where he stood. His body shook with uncontrollable laughter, his chest heaving as he tried to control his breathing. He clutched his abdomen, his face turning red.

"This is absolute gold," he wheezed out, chuckling loudly. "You, the fucking Avengers, want me to do your job!"

"Come on kid, is it a yes or no?" Steve said, rolling his eyes.

"What's in it for me?" Peter asked, finally calming himself down. "Even though I'd usually do this out of the goodness of my heart, I don't feel like it today."

"We'll exempt you from arrest," Natasha offered. "You've been evading SHIELD officers left and right for your previous crimes, so if you help us, we'll tell them to lay off of you."

"Natasha, are you serious?" Steve asked, appalled. "He's a mercenary who's killed more people than we can count, and you're just going to let him off simply for helping us?"

"I'd say that's a fair deal," Clint interrupted, "y'know, if he's going to help us win the battle, he shouldn't be arrested straight after."

"I see that you're forgetting that I kill criminals, Captain," Peter said after a few seconds of silence. "It's not like I go around shooting innocents."

"But you're still a murderer. Those people that you've killed could be locked up. Small bank robbers only deserve ten years maximum in prison over death, don't you think?"

"You think I kill bank robbers?" Peter gasped, lips turning into a frown. "I murder rapists, abusers, and serial killers; completely different category."

"You're a serial killer, so why don't you kill yourself?" Steve argued.

Peter scoffed. "You think I haven't tried that yet?" he laughed. "I overdosed at sixteen and i'm still here, so i'm pretty sure the gods don't want me dead yet."

He was met with silence once again.

"Even though I don't particularly like Mr. Ice-Age, I guess I'll help you. But you need to keep your end of the deal, you feel me?" he continued.

"Deal. You have two hours to prepare, and then we head out," Natasha replied.

Peter smirked. "Whatever you say, Miss Romanov."

>><<

Two hours later Peter walked into the Compound's launch pad, a black backpack slung over his shoulder. His outfit was entirely black, made up of: military pants, a skintight tee, ammo straps, a belt, and a filtered mask that covered his mouth and nose. Two guns sat snugly on his belt and sleek katanas mounted his back.

"Lets get this show on the road," he said after walking up to the Avengers, his voice muffled by his mask. "You need to tell me about your threat."

"Follow me," Wanda replied, motioning for him to follow her onto the jet.

Once the two were seated, she began to explain.

"There is a man by the name of Thanos who's coming to get the mind stone from Vision," she explained. "We need you to kill him before he can get the stone, or else he'll wipe out have of the universe."