Chapter four

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Di ko alam kung paano ako mag re-react sa tanong niya. Ang tanging nagawa ko nalang ang tumitig sa kanya.

Ready na ba ako?

Tanging tanong ko sa sarili.

Handa na ba ako ngayon?

Kaya ko na bang mag kwento sa iba?

Ang dami kong tanong. Kahit ni isa wala akong maisagot. Gusto ko pero parang may humihila sa akin na nagsasabing --

Huwag muna.

Natatakot ako na baka humantong lang itong lahat sa sisihan. Ayaw ko ng maulit ang lahat ng nangyari sa akin noon.

Pilit kong huwag makisalamuha sa iba para makaiwas sa kung ano mang gulong darating.

Gusto ko.

Gusto kong ikwento sa kanya. Gusto kong maniwala sa kanya.

Gusto kong magkaroon ng kahit isang tao man lang na mapagkakatiwalaan.

Pero paano ko malalaman?

Paano ko malalaman na di siya kagaya ng iba?

The moment she asked me. Nakatingin lang ako sa mga mapupungay niyang mata.

Gusto kong malaman kong seryoso ba ang tanong niya o naghahanap lang siya ng paraan para ediscriminate ako.

Yong mga mata niya na parang nangungusap. Di ko alam kung pilit lang ba o makatotohanan.

"Pwede mo kong pagkatiwalaan. Kung iniisip mo na kutulad ako ng iba. Well I'm not used to it." 

She said softly. Soft as like talking to a baby were sleeping afraid to make a noise.

Her eyes are innocent while blinked slowly.

I don't know what's the right words to reply. My heart raced as far as it could to finally reach the finish line.

I touched my chest and it's sounds like the foot steps of the horses racing.

"Pasensya ka na. Di ko pa kaya. Sabi ko naman sa'yo noon na di ako madaling nagtitiwala."

I said as calm of the forest without air beaten of it's twig.

Nakatitig parin siya sa akin na parang umaasa na sana pagkakatiwalaan ko siya.

I closed my eyes and sighed deeply.

She held my cheek and pressed it slowly using her right hand.

"Okay lang. Mag hihintay ako hanggang sa kaya mona."

She smiled a little bit and turned her head unto the road then she drove as fast as she could.

When we arrived her place she parked her car to the vacant parking lot. She went outside and walked to the passenger seat at pinag buksan ako.

"Salamat." I said and prepared myself to walk my way going to my house.

Humarap siya sa akin at ngumiti ng konti.

"Can I invite you inside?"

She requested while scratches her naped.

"Okay lang ba if I refuse your offer?" Nahihiya Kong tanong.

"Please?" But she pleaded.

I shook my head when she held my both hand.

My eyes down in a slow motion unto our hands. I stares it for a moment. Parang nakaramdam ako ng init sa aking mukha.

Nangangamatis na yata ako.

How to refuse?

Nakakahiya naman. Hinatid niya pa ako tapos ngayon di ko siya mapag bigyan. Sino ba kasing nagsabi na ihatid at samahan ako, diba?

Konsensya ko pa tuloy.

"Okay." I nodded slowly.

She flashed her wide smile then she dragged me upstairs.

She opened the door and she signaled me to come in.

I walked behind her while glancing of some design inside of the house.

There's a pure white in everything you see. The design and the arts are amazing. They're catching of an eye. They were truly great.

"Jho, bilis." She waved her hand.

She walked going to the balcony so I followed.

"Mahangin dito kaya dito ka muna at kukuha ako ng maiinom."

She instructed me as she walked to thier kitchen.

I nods and she just smile. I roam my eyes around the erea and it feels good.

Puro glass ang paligid nito. Yong kortina na gamit nila walang kasing puti.

Makalipas ang ilang minuto bumalik siya dala ang naka tray na pagkain at dalawang basong pineapple juice.

Nilagay niya ito sa maliit na table na nasa gitna at tumingin sa akin.

"Okay lang ba sa'yo pineapple juice?"

She asked while holding a glass of pineapple juice and offered it to me.

"It's fine. Salamat." I flash a smile and nod. Inabot ko ang baso na binigay niya sa akin at uminom ng konti.

She sat on the sofa right next to me after giving me a glass of pineapple juice.

"What do you want to eat? I can cook." She asked me gladly.

"Okay lang. Uuwi na rin ako maya-maya."

I refused her offered. I put down the glass that I was holding on to the table then landed my eyes on her. 

She did the same way and looked at me in the eye.

"Di ka ba nagugutom? Mabilis lang akong magluto." She put her hands up "Promise!"  And chuckles.

Di na ako kumibo. Alam kong pipilitin niya rin lang ako pag umayaw ako. I nod my head back and forth at nakita ko ang saya sa mukha niya.

"Okay. Thank you for accepting my offer."

She stood up and took her pineapple juice. She drank a few and put it back down after.

"I'll go to the kitchen muna. Okay ka lang dito? You can watch me cooking while staying there." Concerned niyang pagyaya.

Watching someone while cooking is not my fan. Cooking is not my forte or ideal things to do. So if I would do watching her I might gets sleepy.

"Di na. Okay lang ako dito atsaka sanay na ako." I said flashing my smile and wink. 

"Sure ka huh?" Tanong niya ulit habang hinahawi ang kanyang buhok.

Natulala ako sa ginawa niya. Ang angas ng dating. Pag humahawi siya sa kanyang buhok nakakaakit tignan.

Nakakapigil hininga.

Naasar tuloy ako sa sarili ko. Bakit ako nakakaramdam ng pagkamangha sa iba? Bakit parang nakakaramdam ako ng saya?

And in just the moment I can feel the changes of everything.





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