Hold On (Book 1 of It's Not Over)

January

Warnings: mention of panic attacks, self harm, SI, bullying

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1

New Year went by without a hitch. My dad's job had a party and we were able to talk him into letting Dark Sides play. Roman tagged along and so did Sunniva. We all had a pretty good time and at midnight Roman and I shared a kiss.

I never thought the taller teen to be superstitious, I'm not sure why, but he told me that since we kissed at midnight it meant I was stuck with him for life. I laughed and went back to playing with the band. Remus and De shared a kiss as well, of course.

***

2

Patton finally asked Sunniva out on a date. I have to admit I was surprised she didn't ask him. When I asked about it he said that it was obvious she was crushing, but was just to shy to say anything. Leave it to Patton to be observant of someone else's feelings.

***

3

De and Remus broke up. According to Roman this happens about once every school year. He assured me that they'd be back together before Valentine's Day. He knew them better than I did so I took his word on it.

***

4

Logan and I were hanging out in my room after school when De kicked my door open, luckily it wasn't closed all the way.

"I said knock! Not break my house, De!" My dad yelled from the bottom of the stairs.

"Sorry!" De yelled over his shoulder before fixing Logan with a serious look. "You."

"Me?"

"I forgot your Christmas gift. Here, nerd," he dropped a large package beside the younger teen and then plopped down on my bed as we were both sitting on the floor.

Logan blinked and looked from the package, which had made a rather loud thud when it landed, and then to De before picking it up and opening it. "You did not need to get me a gift De. I understand that our friendship is just a coincidence due to us being in a band together."

"A law book?" I looked from the book Logan had unwrapped to De and back again.

"De...thank you. This gift is quite satisfactory."

"Glad you like it. And don't think that I'm just your friend because of the band, Logan. We were friends before the band. Even if we didn't or don't talk much I still consider you a friend," getting up off my bed De ruffled Logan's hair and then lightly drummed his fingers in my head. "De you losers later. I've got a rat to deal with," he left my room and yelled bye to my dad before I heard the front door open and shut.

"A rat to deal with?" I raised an eyebrow and looked at Logan.

"Yes. De and Remus use animals as code names for all of us. Remus is a rat. You are a cat. De is a snake. Roman is a Dragon. I am an owl. And Patton is a puppy."

"Oh. Wait. Why am I a cat?"

"I have absolutely no idea," Logan shrugged. "What were we talking about?"

"We were going over how you wanted to deal with debate team next week."

"Right."

***

5

I ran out of the classroom and down the hall to the nurse's office. Carter had cornered Logan in tone of the halls and sent the younger teen into a panic attack. When he was calmed down a bit he sent me a text. I didn't even bother asking for permission to leave the classroom before jumping out of my seat and bolting.