How To Save A Life [A Robert Downey Jr. Fan-Fic]

Chapter 18: Knocking On Heaven's Door

"Robert!", I shouted at his unconscious body as the ambulance made its way to the hospital, "Wake up, Robbie! You're not going to die now! Open your eyes and breathe!"

My eyes filled with tears.

But he didn't react.

He didn't wake up. He didn't open his eyes. He did nothing at all. He just laid there, his eyes closed, barely breathing.

"I won't let you die here", I sobbed and regarded him closely, "You didn't give up on me and neither do I now!"

"Good morning, my darling", he greeted smirkingly and tucked a strand behind my ear as we still laid in bed, the sun shining brightly through the huge windows behind my back.

"Good morning", I replied apathetically, staring through him.

"Did you sleep well last night?", he asked curiously and softly stroked my cheek with his thumb.

I nodded slightly.

"I'm okay", I lied and faked a smile.

"Really?", he wanted to know, knowing I was lying to him, "Because I swear I've heard you cry last night..."

Immediately, my eyes filled with tears.

"What's up, sweetheart? You can tell me, remember?", he whispered and smiled at me, "Anyway, it's absolutely needless to lie to me. Because I can see you're dying a little more inside. Every night, you scream her name and cry your eyes out. But I promised you, we'd fix this together, Kate. I'm not giving up on you. I know, it's a bad world we're living in. This world just keeps spinning around, no matter what happened. People, they forget what you've been through. But I'll always be here for you, Kate. We'll get through this together."

I watched Robert's chest slowly move up and down. He looked so peaceful laying in the hospital bed, his eyes closed because he was finally sleeping- mostly because of all the pain medication he got.

I laid down right next to him, resting my head on his shoulder as our fingers intertwined. I closed my eyes and listened to his steady and comforting heartbeat.

"I'm not giving up on you, Robbie", I repeated quietly and gently kissed his cheek.

A bright light appeared just a few steps away from me before I recognized a familiar silhouette slowly appearing at the horizon as he walked towards me.

"Kate?", he asked quietly, his caramel eyes regarding me closely.

"Robbie", I said in surprise, "You're not supposed to be here."

"Where am I?", he wanted to know and curiously looked around, "Is this heaven?"

I chuckled and shook my head.

"No, unfortunately not", I answered and smiled weakly, "This is just same place in between..."

He nodded slightly.

"You shouldn't be here", I repeated reproachfully.

"Neither should you", he countered and faked a smile.

I half smiled at him, trying to make him feel comfortable.

"You don't belong to this place, Robbie", I whispered and reached for his hand. But this time, I couldn't touch him. He simply slipped through my fingers.

My eyes filled with tears but I tried to hide them in front of Robert. He shouldn't worry about me.

It really hurt to be so close to him but still not be able to sense him.

"Why am I here?", he asked curiously and looked at me with his puppy eyes, "Is this even real?"

"There's one simple answer to both of your questions", I replied and smirked at him, "You're high, Robbie. You don't know how much pain medication you got."

Immediately, both of us started to laugh. But soon our laughter ebbed away.

"I'm sorry, Kate", he apologized then and wanted to hold my hand until he realized he couldn't sense me either, "I never wanted this to happen..."

"It's okay, Robbie. I'm fine. Don't worry about me", I tried to talk him down with a weak smile on my lips, "There was nothing you could have done to prevent the events of that night."

He swallowed hard and took a deep breath.

"But it was my fault", he added seriously, "I should have died instead of you..."

"No!", I stopped him, "Everything is how it's supposed to be. And don't worry, it didn't hurt at all."

He nodded slightly but I knew he was still blaming himself for everything. But I didn't want to spend the scent time we had by talking about my death. I wanted to enjoy this moment as long as it lasted.

I reached out my hand and offered him to follow me, knowing he couldn't hold my hand at all.

"Come with me, Robbie", I whispered and offered him a smile, "Just lay down with me and savor this rare moment. Just forget the world... It keeps spinning around anyway."

He chuckled and quietly laid down on the ground next to me.

"I've always loved your optimism", he whispered and crossed his arms behind his neck.

We laid down like this for a while, simply staring up to the sky, enjoying the intimate togetherness. And I don't know how many minutes passed by like this.

"I'll always love you, Kate", he whispered then and looked at me, "I don't want you to ever forget about that."

"I won't", I promised and looked right into his sad caramel eyes, I got completely lost in every time, "Unless you won't ever forget how much more I love you."

"Meh, I doubt that", he retorted smirkingly and I playfully tried to punch his shoulder but couldn't touch him again.

"You're an idiot", I muttered, smiling from one ear to another.

"Meh, I doubt that", he repeated and his smile widened.

For a second, we simply stared into each other's eyes.

"Well, usually I'd kiss you now", he mumbled quietly, "But obviously I can't."

"Then you should feel kissed", I suggested and smirked at him.

"I do", he agreed.

Suddenly, I perceived a strange feeling. A feeling as if something was slowly pulling Robert away from me.

His caramel eyes stared at me, obviously feeling the same.

"I guess, it's time", I whispered and fought against the upcoming tears in my eyes as I recognized Robert was slowly vanishing in front of me.

"Will I see you again?", he wanted to know, an expression of fear and loneliness in his eyes.

"I'll try", I replied, "I can't promise but I'll try, Robbie."

He nodded slightly before he vanished completely.

I opened my eyes and recognized a tear streaming down his cheek while his whole body tensed up.

I ran my fingers through his dark brown hair and gently kissed his cheek.

"Thank you for not dying", I whispered into his ear.