Faking Feelings (Muke)

Ch. 22 - Jump Then Fall

Dear Stupid Diary,

All of yesterday afternoon and night, I got cyber bullied... I woke up this morning to the same thing...

It never ends.

I can't take this crap anymore.

- Michael x

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I wouldn't tell mum where I was going when I left the house in skinny jeans and a Green Day shirt, instead of my school uniform... Half an hour earlier than I had to leave for school anyway.

But she must of called Luke to ask him if he knew where I was going, because he kept texting me... And I kept ignoring him.

I knew where I was going though, and nobody was going to stop me.

Right now, I'm standing on the wrong side of the railing of the bridge, my arms bent back behind me to hold onto the railing, looking down at the water below.

The water is not very calm today, it's quite windy this morning, so the waves are very rough.

Holding onto the railing with only one arm, I use my free hand to send Luke a text.

Me: I love you. Goodbye.

Luke: Michael Gordon Clifford, where are you? Tell me.

Me: I'm on the bridge.

*Incoming call from Him <3*

"Don't you dare" is the first thing he says when I pick up. "Michael, don't leave me" he begs, his voice shaking. "I can't lose you, Michael, please don't fucking leave me alone" he starts sobbing into the phone.

Guilt jabs me in the stomach.

"Please" he begs weakly.

"I love you, Luke, I'm so sorry" I choke out, scaring him a little that I actually spoke.

"M-Michael, I love you, too! But please don't, please, please, please!" He cries.

"Goodbye" I say, and hang up.

I stick my phone in my jeans pocket and stare back down at the water.

He won't get here in time, even if he tries.

I tilt my head back and close my eyes, enjoying the breeze that's threatening to knock me off into the water below.

My mind goes blank of everything apart from Luke, Calum & Ashton.

I think of their smiles, their laughs, just them in general... It makes me feel relaxed.

I must of zoned out for longer than I thought though, because suddenly, I can hear Luke shouting my name.

My eyes dart open and I follow the sound of his voice to find him running towards me.

I won't let him stop me. I can't.

I take a deep breath, lean forward, and let go.

"Michael!" Luke screams, his arms slipping underneath my arms and wrapping around my chest before I could actually fall. He pulls me back towards the railing and I burst into tears. "Don't even think about it" he sobs, burying his face in my neck.

"Luke" I choke out, he squeezes me tighter.

"I'll help you through everything, just don't leave me alone" he begs. Before I could respond, he's pulling me back over the railing. We land on the ground together, Luke instantly pulls me into his lap and I snuggle up to him.

"I'm sorry" I whisper. He gently grabs my chin and makes me look up at him.

"Never feel sorry about wanting to make the pain end" he tells me, then kisses me.