Bridge over troubled waters

35| Don't Speak

Corey

"Please" Bailey begs as I roll my eyes. She sticks out that bottom lip and I can already feel myself breaking.

"No Bailey" I demand as I try to walk away from her. She grabs my wrist and her touch made me freeze in my spot. Damn her.

"Pleaaaaase" she begs again.

I let out a long sigh before letting my head fall... what am I getting myself into? "Okay! I'll do it" I yell causing her to yell too.  

She kisses my cheek before taking off to her apartment complex for lord knows what now.

Bailey came over this morning with a proposal that I model in some pictures for her. Of course I said no at first for I'm a athlete and the only time I like having my pictures taken is if my mask is on and I'm wearing a jersey. And I don't know there's pictures being taken of me.

But it's Bailey so she begged and I said no so she begged again and I said yes. That's how it goes around here. I say no, she says yes and then I end up doing whatever it is anyway because that's what you do when you're in love.

So she makes me put on my best suit and she does my hair. Once she's satisfied with how I look we head on out to navy pier to start taking pictures. "Wouldn't you much rather have a professional doing this" I ask.

"You a professional" she smirks.

"A professional hockey player" I correct.

"Still a professional" she teases.

I just roll my eyes as I lean up against the railing that separated me from Lake Michigan. I look out at the water and let out a long sigh. I see Bailey come up beside me and lean in to my arm. She rests her head on my shoulder and I smile to myself.

"Tired from forcing me to do this" I tease.

She lets out a loud scoff making me smile. "Please! You guilted next into doing so many things for you. This is just getting even" she defends.

"I know" I laugh. "Just giving you a hard time."

"Like always" she mumbles.

"I couldn't make this easy for you" I joke.

"Never have" she adds on. 

"And that's why we're so good together" I insist.

"That we are" she smiles. "That we are."

We get started and I swear to god she takes a million pictures. Most of them are her yelling at me to smile but her yelling is what made me smile in the first place. So we go on like this for a while before she started to get irritated and I did what I was told the first time.

"Okay, a few more" she promised as I roll my eyes. She said that 20 minutes ago.

But instead of throwing a fit I just turn to the camera and smile. I see Bailey smile when she looks at me through the lens and it makes my heart skip a beat.

"Why are you smiling like that" I tease.

"Because of you" she admits.

I feel my cheeks heat up as I try to see her behind the camera. "Yeah right" I accuse.

"What? You can say all these sweet things about me but when I say it it's not true" she asks.

"Well yeah, you..." I trail off once I realize what I was saying. She takes the camera down as she just smiles at me. "You don't feel the same way I feel about you" I finally finish.

Her face drops as she just stares at me. She gets a upset expression that I can't seem to read. "I hate that you think that way" she accuses.

"I don't know what else to think" I defend.

"You think you can seem me in the way you do and I don't reciprocate any of those feelings" she asks. My shoulders fall to my side as I look at the ground. "Corey I think you are the greatest person in the world. I think you're an amazing goalie who is going to do a lot in this city. But I also know that it's more than just that.

You're so very handsome and the funniest guy I know. And I'm the only person you ever want to share that with. You think I don't think about you all the time? You think I don't dream of another universe where I'm not so scared to lose you as a friend so we can be more than that? You think I don't sit in my apartment and want to run over to yours and just kiss you so I know if I'm losing my mind or not?

You mean the world to me Cor, that's why I can't lose you. That's why I can't let these feelings blind me from seeing the dangers of us being more than friends" she explains.

I look up at her as I try and let it all sink in. I didn't know she felt that way. I was always bad with interpreting feelings, even when it came to Bailey. And she was a little too good at hiding them too.

Now I'm not quite sure what I want. I will always want her but I don't want to ruin what we already have either. That would suck.

"Bailey you need to know that I lo-" I start.

"Don't-" she interrupts. "Please don't finish it" she whispers.

"You already know though. And you feel the same way" I accuse.

"We can't right now Corey. We just can't" she claims.

"Why not" I question. "If not now then when" I ask.

"When I'm not such a mess" she claims. "When I'm ready to do this. When I'm not so broken down and I can be what you deserve. And right now, I'm not close to being any of that to you. 

I'm sorry Corey. I'm so sorry" she says softly.

She turns to go away but I reach out and grab her. "Wait. Please don't get upset" I beg.

"I just want you to be happy" she sniffles.

"You make me happy. Even when you drag me into the city in this hot suit making me take a million pictures. And you know why you make me happy, even if you won't let me tell you why" I assure her.

"I'm not trying to sound like an ass. I just don't want you to say it and not be able to unsay it, you know" she asks.

I let out a sigh because she was right. She was always right. "I know" I agree.

(P.S. Merry Christmas 😄)