Safe

-20- Fixtures & Cranberries

Kendra Lincoln

Holt is thrumming from excitement. Maybe not in the normal way someone might show their enthusiasm but his eyes are bright, a softness to his features, a little more sure of himself as we pile into the car after his game.

I have to admit. I was livid when Luke sent Holt out onto the court. And even more so when Rhett finally got down to Luke only to end up watching Holt play rather than pulling him out like he had intended to do. But as the minutes passed and Holt kept playing and the score between us and Paramount decreased I found myself screaming Holt's name as loud as I could, cheering him on.

When the buzzer finally went off and we had won by a very small margin, I leapt from my seat, scurrying down to the sidelines to congratulate Holt.

He gave me the smallest smile when he spotted me. Truly one of the best moments of my life.

"Man that game." Rhett muses as we drive home now.

"It was a good one." I agree.

I watch Rhett drive beside me, fingers tapping to the song that's playing faintly in the background. He's got a smirk on his face.

"You are a force Holt." He says. "An absolute force. Have you thought about college ball? Going pro even?"

He glances in the rear view mirror and I wish that I could do the same.

"No sir." Holt says.

"You might want to think about it. Scouts would be out now looking at players. You, my son, could maybe even get a scholarship." He continues on.

"Slow down Rhett." I tell him quietly.

"Assuming college is something you want to do." He adds.  "Do you?"

Holt doesn't answer immediately and I fight the urge to spin in my seat so I can see him.

"I-I don't know sir."

Before Rhett can keep pushing the subject I intercept. "I'll get you some information on colleges and we can sit down and look at it together."

"Yes ma'am."

We drive for another few minutes before Thanksgiving pops in my head and I know I need to make sure one more time that Holt will still go.

"Are you still feeling up to Thanksgiving?" I ask.

I'm met with a moment of silence, my heart thumping in my chest as I anticipate him saying no. Rhett glances at me as he drives, reaching for my hand and I squeeze it.

"Yes ma'am."

                             ————————

"I've already got the turkey." Meghan says. "And moms bringing stuffing and green beans. I just never feel like we have enough food."

"What should I bring?" I ask casually.

I haven't told anyone yet that we are coming. I was trying to give Holt enough time to change his mind. But even with everything that's happened he still agreed last night after his game.  So I've decided to start telling everyone, Meghan first, so she has time to wrap her mind around it.

"You're coming?" She doesn't believe me.

"Yes we are." I confirm.

I'm clicking through pictures, trying to pick out hardware to go with light yellow cabinets and white counters in a remodeled farmhouse.

"Just you?" She asks.

"And Rhett and Holt. The three of us."

I can almost see the shock on her face. "You mean you're actually making him meet us officially?"

"Meghan.." she instantly frustrates me.

"I'm surprised is all Kendra. I mean, you and Rhett decided to adopt the boy without us meeting him. I just figured you'd continue on celebrating by yourself now that you have your family you've always wanted."

"Oh don't be so dramatic." I roll my eyes not that anyone is there to see.

"And you're not worried about how he'll handle it?" She asks.

Oh I am. I almost told him that I had changed my mind. Just to spare him what I know will be a difficult and overwhelming experience. But I also know that I can't shelter him from everything. And I can't make his past go away. So the only thing I can do moving forward is try to make him feel that he does in fact belong here and that he is apart of the family. Hiding him away from them won't do that.

"Of course I'm worried." I tell her. "But he's going to be officially apart of the family and I think we've made a little bit of progress."

I don't think that his confession was a spur of the moment slip. I think he wants to trust me, and I think some of him does.

"Really?" Her snarky attitude decreases slightly.

I nod my head. "He's going to see a therapist again."

"They didn't do anything last time to help him you said. What makes this time so special?"

I also haven't told my family everything that's happened in the last few weeks. They know about the hospital, a nicer less traumatic version of it. And I'm not sure how much I want to disclose. When Holt called me out about telling Luke, I had the revelation that maybe we should have let him decide who he tells and when.

"He's opened up to us a little." I offer.

"How so?"

I should know better than to think Meghan would accept a vague answer.

"About things that happened before he started living with us."

I find a silver finished knob, a small ridge circling the outside. It's clean and simple and will pair nice with the shaker style cabinets.

"What kind of things?" She asks.

I let out a breath, dropping the knob into the online cart and go to search for the last light fixture. I've been searching for something specific, what it is, I'm not sure. I'll know it when I see it.

"Lots of things Meghan." Irritation oozing from my voice.

"I'm just trying to understand Kendra." She snaps back.

Pinching the bridge of my nose as if it might release the tension that's building inside me I take a breath.

"He was abused Meghan." I say on a defeated sigh, not elaborating further than that.

"What? By who?"

"We don't know yet. He won't say."

"Well that explains a lot." She says.

I nod my head, agreeing. "So we're going to come and see how it goes."

"I think it's great, he can meet the girls and Chris finally. Maybe we can all start doing things together like we used to."

I don't tell her that I doubt that will happen. At least for now. Holt still isn't comfortable with Rhett.

"Yeah." I say. "Maybe."

But it seems to appease her because she jumps back to thanksgiving dinner without another thought.

"So can you bring the cranberries and maybe a dessert too?

                             ————————

Whoa this is chapter 20. How'd that happen?