Safe

-47- Blue

Holt Lincoln

"This is Faith." The man at the kennel gestures at a girl with hair so blond it's nearly white and smoky eyes. She smiles, a beautiful, warm smile that somehow eases the tension that's crept into my body. "She'll take you back to the kennels. If you have any questions or want to see a dog, she's your girl."

"Thank you." Mrs. Lincoln tells him.

I stand quietly behind Mrs. Lincoln as she exchanges pleasantries with the girl. And I follow behind, head down, watching the heel of Mrs. Lincoln's shoes leave the floor with each step she takes.

We pass through a door that Faith holds open and instantly the room erupts in barking. My heart slams in my chest, my steps hesitating as both Mrs. Lincoln and Faith turn to me.

"So do you have a type of dog in mind?" Faith asks as the dogs slowly settle down.

I just shake my head no, words caught in my throat as I take in my surroundings.

"We'd like to find a dog that we could eventually get certified as an emotional support dog." Mrs. Lincoln explains. "So maybe nothing too high strung."

"I know the perfect dog!" A younger boy chimes, his features so similar to Faith's that they must be siblings.  "This way."

He appears between the rows of kennels, an inviting smile and bright blue eyes.

"That's my brother." Faith tells us, admiration in her voice. "Elijah."

"Go ahead honey." Mrs. Lincoln shoos me off. "Faith and I will look around too."

It takes me a minute to move but I force myself forward, heading for the row the boy is down. He meets me at the end, jutting his hand out toward me. I shake it but only because I don't want to seem weird. Well weirder than I normally seem.

"I'm Elijah. You're so lucky you get to have a dog. Come here let me show you Blue." He rattles off. "So he's like the sweetest dog ever. Kevin the guy that runs this place got a call about a dog in the yard of an abandon house. Someone just tied him up and left him there isn't that crazy?"

I'm overwhelmed but I manage to mumble out "yeah".

"He's been here for a while, no one will adopt him because he's a Pitt Bull which is ridiculous if you ask me because Pitts aren't bad. It's all in how you raise them I think." He glances at me over his shoulder coming to a stop at a kennel. "This is Blue."

A solid built dog sits at the front of the cage, tail thumping, tongue out. It's face splits right down the center, half black the other white. It smiles up at me.

"If I could, I'd take him home with me." Elijah says.

"Why can't you?" Curiosity gets the better of me.

He shrugs his shoulders. "My dad's allergic. As soon as I move out though, I'm rescuing a dog. My sister too. I've taught him some tricks I can sho-."

"Elijah." Faith is walking down the lane of kennels. "Let him look around if he wants."

"But Faith, it's Blue. He'd be perfect." He tells her.

"Come on."

She gives me a polite smile, leaving me standing in front of the black and white dog. Elijah wraps his arm around her shoulders, a few inches taller than her already even though he must be younger.

"Blue deserves a family, a home." Elijah tells her. "Someone that's going to love him for who he is."

"I know." I stare at their backs as they walk, voices growing quieter the farther they get from me until I can't hear what Elijah says next.

I shift my gaze back to the dog who's still watching me, his tongue out, tail wagging. My encounters with dogs are basically non existent. I've never lived in a house with one.

But I know what it's like to need a family.

And this place feels lonely.

Slowly, I crouch down, sitting back onto my heels as I watch the dog watch me. He stands up, his whole body wagging with his tail, a smile spread across his jowls. His one eye that's surrounded by white is blue, the other brown. Makes him look like someone smashed together two different dogs.

He presses his nose between the bars of the kennel so hard I'm afraid he's going to get it stuck so I reach my hand out to push it back in but before I can reach his nose his tongue shoots out of his mouth and he licks my fingers.

"Your gonna hurt yourself." I tell him quietly. "I'll come to you."

I shimmy across the floor until I'm pressed against the front of his kennel. A white paw reaches through the bars and lands on my leg and a smile tugs the corner of my mouth upward. He tries to shift closer to me so I shove my hand through the bar, scratching his chest, his tongue lapping in and out of his mouth desperately trying to reach me.

"Your names Blue?" I ask him. "I'm Holt." He let's out a whimper. "I needed a family too." I give him my other hand to lick, still scratching his chest with my other. "They're really nice. I like them a lot."

I don't know if it's supposed to be like this. If I'm supposed to feel like Blue understands. That he knows without me telling him everything I've done, everything that's happened and he just doesn't care. I'm just me. And I'm good enough just as I am.

"They think a dog might help me." I say. "Do you think you can?"

He whimpers and whines, trying to pull me closer or tug himself through I'm not sure which.

"Find someone you like?" Mrs. Lincoln asks my eyes darting up to her, heart instantly slamming in my chest.

But I nod my head, not moving from where I am.

"Blue." She says his name fondly before she kneels down across from me. "Seems as though he likes you back."

"Do you want me to get him out for you?" Faith sounds behind me and my whole body jerks, hands growing still until I feel Blue nudge my hand.

I go back to scratching him.

"Yes, that would be great, thank you." Mrs. Lincoln says.

I don't want to move, I want to stay there next to Blue but I untangle myself from the kennel door and stand to my feet. Blue whines the whole time, frantically dancing until the gate is opened and Faith snaps a leash on the collar. Blue pushes past her with his stocky body and I once again kneel so I'm closer to his level. He half sits, half slides his way to me, smashing his chest against me as he licks the side of my face.

A laugh slips out of me as I close my arms around the wiggling dog, pulling him closer.

"Looks like he chose you too." Elijah says.

"What you do think honey? Is he the dog you want?" Mrs. Lincoln asks me.

I close my eyes and for once it's not the basement lingering in my mind. All I can focus on is the tongue slapping against my face and his soft fur and solid body squirming in my lap and everything feels calm. Safe.

Looking up I meet Mrs. Lincoln's gaze and she's smiling at me, eyes pooled with tears.

"Yeah." I say. "I want him."

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Ugh guys. I love this chapter. And because I'm awesome, daily updates are limping along.