Should I? (Guren x Reader)

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Two years. That’s how long it had been since you had become Guren’s lover. He was still the same immature fool even now, with reckless ideas and a solitary stance on life. You’d known that dating him wouldn’t be the smoothest path to track down, especially not with his womanizing ways. But you’d have never thought that he’d actually act upon those urges. 

It was today, this morning to be exact when you had wandered into his office with a plate full of biscuits, a thoughtful gesture. But, when you walked into the office, not understanding the need to knock when meetings did not start for another hour, you found a woman lay upon his desk. Papers were strewn across the floor in a scattered array of mess hiding the bits of clothing which lay hidden beneath the white parchment. Even the photo you had given him for his birthday, held in a birch wood photo frame, resided on the floor, it’s glass shattered to hide your smiling faces. 

Your eyes then moved up to look at your partner. He stood there behind his desk in nothing but half buttoned pants. To say you were horrified would be an understatement as he swore loudly trying to cover up his act. The girl beneath him, red-cheeked with barely anything to hide her appealing body darted up, running to grab her clothes whilst profusely apologizing. Guren then stood with you, alone in the room. YOu had wondered why he had begun to work so early when he so preciously values sleep. Now you knew, and the pain you felt twisted your heart up into a sailors knot. 

He remained silent, watching you with his analysing gaze. THe hand holding the biscuits trembled, following from the anger that burned inside of you, but not just anger welled up. You felt shame. Shame of allowing this man to play you like a game. THat’s all you could ever be to a man like him. Why couldn’t you have loved Shinya? A sob left your lips as he began to approach you, but a single hand stopped him. “Don’t come near me,” you uttered with as much courage you could muster before turning on your heel and running away from the office. 

The image remained branded into your skull as you turned down a side corridor, but behind you could hear the desperate calls of your name. You couldn’t go back to your shared apartment so you went to the only other place you knew. Your Teammate (F/N)’s apartment. You walked as fast as you can, avoiding the questioning glances of passers-by who saw your blotchy eyes and sniffling nose. 

It was their room where you were currently staying 3 days later, tucked up on their sofa with a drink and the (now empty) plate of biscuits. (F/N) looked furious as you recited the details of what you had witnessed, and after finding no good reason for his stupidity and wrong-doing they soon came to the conclusion that they’d have to kill him. You remained hidden beneath several layers of blankets, a tissue stuffed up each nostril to stop the running nose caused by your tears. The weapon which now lay beside your feet hummed in disapproval, which soon turned to rage. Your demon was just as angry as you were, and controlling him was hard enough on a good day. Vesper, the name of your demon is incredibly loyal compared to the rest of his counterparts, and this much was evident when all who hurt you soon felt the wrath of this inky demon. 

You calmed your breath, smiling as you watched your teammate extravagantly act out how she would hurt him. That was until a knock sounded at her door. It wasn’t a weak or feeble knock, nor was it angry. But it was determined. (F/N) stilled, frowning as she cast a fleeting glance in your direction before opening the door a crack. You remained out of you, but by the sudden fury on (F/N)’s face, you could guess who it was. 

His voice echoed into the room. It seemed strained as he called out your name. But (F/N) ignored his attempts to contact you and began to shut the door. That was until you feel the soft thrum of Vesper, like a harp with strings welded from knives. It played a deadly, but beautiful rhythm as you stood up. Ignoring the calls of your demon you wandered to the door. You thought you looked back, but as you popped your head around (F/N) you saw that Guren had outdone you. The bags beneath his eyes were a deep purple, his hair was unbrushed and clearly hasn't made contact with a shower in days. His uniform had been buttoned incorrectly leaving his shirt hanging in an odd manner, yet his features hadn’t changed. He still looked handsome, like the man you had first fallen in love with. 

You sighed, and with a hand on (F/N)’s shoulder, you pushed back to meet the cheating pig. “What do you want?” you ask, showing only irritation in your voice as you learnt against the wall. (F/N) soon got the idea and wandered into their apartment out of earshot from the strained conversation. He trailed a tired hand through his dishevelled mess of hair before looking down at you. “I’m sorry. I never meant for it to get as far as it did.” 

You rolled your eyes and began to turn back into the apartment. “Don’t bullshit me Guren, if you never meant for it to get that far then you wouldn't have started it in the first place.” A tight grip held onto your arm, his fingers were gentle but firm as he pulled you back to look at him. “You have to understand that I care about you.” 

You stayed silent. 

“God! Even Shinya can vouch for me this time.” His hand flailed in the air in an attempt to make sense of his actions. But, as you looked closer at his face, particularly his mesmerizing eyes, you saw that they were glassy, like that before a tear. You’d never seen Guren cry, of course he had seen you cry several times, whether that be due to a sad film or stubbing your toe as you climbed back into bed after grabbing a midnight snack. 

You sighed, it was reluctantly of course as you brought up a finger to wipe away the tears that had began to trickle down his cheek. To see Guren show his emotions left you astounded, and the words that left his lips seemed to never reach your ears as you cast your gaze back down at the ground. Could you ever forgive him? You had cried and wasted so many tears and thoughts on this man, but he had still cheated on you and that was something that you could never forget. You had been loyal, and he had been nothing bit a viper waiting to strike in the dark. You pulled the blanket tighter around your body, using it as a comfort against the invisible winds barreling down the corridor whilst you thought. 

His slender fingers then held your chin, tilting it to look up at him. “(Y/N), please forgive me. I can’t sleep without you, I can’t eat without you...” He looked away, like sharing these sensitive words was painful. You couldn’t help but chuckle at his sad attempt of an apology and his eyes seemed to light up at the sound of your laugh. He continued, “I nearly died yesterday during a battle against a noble yesterday becuause the flowers nearby just reminded me so much of you.” 

You raised an eyebrow in surprise, but as you looked at the slight part of his chest on show due to the mismatched buttoning of his shirt, you saw a blossoming bruise peeking out from beneath the thin fabric. Perhaps giving him one last chance to redeem himself wasn’t so bad. So you stepped towards him, reluctantly leaning away from the door frame. “I’ll forgive you, but there are no more chances after this.” You looked at him, tears threatening to well up in your own eyes as you continued speaking. “You mess up even once and I will leave your sorry ass without a second glance.” He nodded obediently and the smile on his face grew to match that of the cheshire cat.

“Deal.”

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