Heaven and Hell Start With the Same Letter (Frerard AU)

9

I giggle at a joke Gerard whispers into my ear, and I earn a glare from one of the kids. I make eye contact but quickly look away, and I can see him snickering at me from the corner of my eye. Getting glares and judgmental looks from people doesn't bother me anymore. You never escape those things, even when you're in a mental facility filled with people who are like that.

"Hey Gerard?"

"Yeah?", he asks, toying with my hair.

"When did you know you were...you know...?"

He chuckles, "Gay?"

I nod, blushing a little.

"I'm actually bi, but I prefer guys more. I realized when I had to break up with my girlfriend of two years when I fell in love, or thought I fell in love, with this guy who was a grade above me. It obviously didn't work out, he was too scared of being outed, and we never had any fun. There was never any of the whole 'spark', and 'firework' thing."

"Oh."

He smiles at me, and returns to playing with my hair, and I return to just staring at the tv, though not taking anything in. It's on discovery channel, but I could care less about alligators, or whatever they're talking about. They get to the part where they tell you the difference between a crocodile and an alligator when the same guy from before walks up to us.

"Are you guys dating?"

I look around the room, trying to find a nurse, but they've left us alone in the room. Great job, who decided to leave a bunch of mentally unstable kids in a room alone?

"Yes, we are.", Gerard says, straightening up a little, his hands leaving my hair.

"So you guys are a pair of fags?"

"Hey, dude, watch your mouth.", Gerard says, standing up.

"No wonder you guys are here.", he says, snickering.

I'm starting to get anxious, and I can feel my throat starting to tighten. I tug on the corner of Gerard's shirt, and he looks down.

"Can we go?", I mutter out.

He nods, and takes my hand, pulling me up.

"Where the fuck do you think you're going?", the guys asks, stepping in front of us.

"We're leaving, so can you just leave us alone?", Gerard says, trying to step around him.

The guy pushes Gerard's shoulder, making him stumble back a little.

-I told you they'd hurt you. You never listen to me.-

"Please just leave us alone.", I whisper out.

Im not sure if it's to the the voices, or to him, maybe it's to both, I don't know.
The boy laughs at me, and pushes me to the ground. He kicks me in the side, and twice to head, and that's when everything blacks out.

*

I can hear his voice, his laughing, the first time in years. It sounds so real, but it can't be, because he's dead. He's been dead for four years. But I can still hear it, he's still laughing.

I follow the sound, and soon enough, I'm facing the back of Toms kneeling body.

"Tom?!"

He turns around, and he looks exactly the same as I remembered him, just a little bit older.

"Am, am I dead?", I stutter out, confused as to why I can see him.

He doesn't say anything, and turns back around, laughing at whatever he was laughing at. It's like I wasn't even here.

"Tom, please!"

He turns around again, but just like before, doesn't say anything, returning to his own business. I try to walk closer, and the distance lengthens, just like my normal nightmares, except he was alive this time. He wasn't just a corpse on the floor, or hanging from the ceiling, no he was laughing, and he looked...clean. I try getting closer, but the distance between us would never shorten, and it never will shorten. I just want to be able to hold him one more time, just to tell him how much I love him, and how much I miss him.

Suddenly, he stands up, and the black figures are back. I back away, but there's no where for me to go. They move closer to Tom, and he's trying to back away from them, but he can't move fast enough.

"Please! Please don't.", he screams out, but the black figures keep moving closer, ignoring his cries.

I try to run to him, to pull him away, but I just can't get close enough, I'm screaming too, I know I am because my mouth is open, and there are tears streaming down my face, but no sound is coming out.

Tom disappears between the black figures, and they retreat, leaving me alone. I fall to my knees, and I can hear them laughing at me, mocking me. I pull at my hair, and I hit my head against the floor.

"Just let me die! Please! Take me with you too.", I scream out, but I'm met with nothing but silence, and suddenly, I miss the voices.