Why Dont We Imagines & preferences

{When}

(Imagine yourself, and a boy of your choice. Let the words feed the image in your head, and hopefully, it all makes sense)

This feeling was indescribable, but I'll try. When we first talked on the phone, my heart smiled. The skies cleared of the snow trapping me indoors, the wind settled to a hushed whispered, the sun came out of hiding.

When we first met, the small red hue never left my cheeks. The smile etched on my face never faltered, not even once. The silence wasn't deafening, it never choked out the conversation. It was comfortable.

When we first touched, I lost my mind. The first time I wrapped my arms around your tall frame, I felt safe. I buried my head in your hoodie, and for one split moment, I caught wind of my favourite sent, you.

When we first cuddled, I realized it was my favourite thing to do. Our movements were in sync, we never broke contact. We went from me, lying against your body with your arms wrapped securely around my waist, to you lying on top of me, your head nuzzled into my shoulder as we both fought sleep.

When we first got close, my heartbeat rose. The moment was so pure, so untainted and innocent, that no matter what you do, I wouldn't think of it any other way. It was the way you pointed it out, the words am I making you nervous? , the way I could only nod my head, do you want me to move? It was kind, respectful, but the last thing I wanted. The movie in front of us was drowned out by each other, us being too indulged in each other to notice. My voice was small because I was to scared to brake the atmosphere. No.

When you rose a few centimetres above me, and slowly leaned down, I thought for sure you were going to kiss me. But then, you gave me an Eskimo kiss instead. Your nose brushed against mine softly, swiftly. You looked at me then, and stopped. You were close, so close that my breath hitched in my throat.

When we kissed, my mind froze. They talk about sparks, the fireworks that are supposed to go off. It was my fantasy. In reality, I don't think there was a single thought going through my mind but you. Your lips were hungry for my own, and happily, I gave them to you. Your hands trailed softly up and down my legs, my hands ran through your hair.

When we broke for air, I couldn't stop smiling. You leaned up, and kissed my forehead. It was such a small gesture, but it made me feel some type of way, beyond liking you, but to scared, to soon, to say loved you.

You fell back into my shoulder and I continued to play with your hair, gently giving a kiss on your ear, or your cheek. When you grew tired of it, you kissed me again. I loved it. I haven't felt a feeling I loved that much since.

I begged you to stay, you didn't want to go, so we laid for a little longer. It wasn't till you had little time to make it home in time that you left.

It was the last time you were here.

Life caught up with you, consuming your thoughts, needs, and wants. I wasn't in the mix. I told you not to apologize for being human, that we were the right people, just at the wrong time.

Then I realized it wasn't life at all. Other girls flooded your texts, promised the things I wouldn't give you. I knew it would happen, but I was determined not to let it hurt me. I tried to put a shield around my heart, my feelings. I confided with only certain people about my progress, how hard I fell, or how high I flew.

I didn't know I trusted the wrong people. You started talking to her after I got rid of every communication with you I had. I can't decide what broke me more.

I thought I only lost one person, turns out I never even had two of them.

I just hope you're doing well, and life hasn't kicked you in the ass to hard yet.

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Not to be a Debbie downer, but love sucks sometimes. This was me, describing the first time I kissed a boy.

I didn't want to go into how hard I exactly fell, it might be a story for another time.

I'm going through some feelings and thoughts right now that I might try to put into words. Confide in people I don't know, who can't judge me instead of the ones who can.

I hope you guys like it, and if you could show it some love, that would help :):