I'll Keep This Secret For You

Chapter 124

Steve comes back and picks the two of you up the next morning just as he said he would as soon as Howard gives the all clear for Bucky to leave.

"I'm sorry, I can't see any other way of predicting when another of these episodes is going to happen. Just go home and try to live as normally as possible, as dire as it sounds we are going to just have to hope that it doesn't happen again at a bad time... like during a mission." He shudders.

"Or in front of the kids." You point out in dread.

"I promise if I feel a headache coming on ever again I'm just gonna go lie down in bed." Bucky  mumbles sadly.

You've both only been up a few minutes and you can already see how down in the dumps he is.

Steve drops you home while Isla and Luke are still asleep. Emma is already up feeding Lilly, Blue and Theo and the second she must hear the door open she must spring to her feet because she is right there to greet you.

"Is everything alright?" She asks in a whispered tone.

You look back at Bucky.

He smiles, his lips forming a thin line. "It's all fine now. Thank you."

"Thank you so much for this. I'm sorry about the change of plans." You can't help but hug her gratefully. "I don't know what we would've done without you last night."

"Oh no don't worry about it." She smiles and waves it off.

You bid her goodbye and she says goodbye to the three who are up. You can tell straight away that the kids must've enjoyed her company because Theo gets all upset when she goes to leave. But once she's gone he is just as happy to see you guys. Both you and Bucky pick each of them up, hugging and squeezing and kissing them, just glad to be back home and able to try and feel normal.

So much has happened in the last twelve hours and it feels like your lives are going to change for ever. You already know you're going to look at everything differently now and be so worried about everything.

"Are you tired? Why don't you go back to bed? I can deal with these guys today?" You ask Bucky, noting the dark puffy circles under his bloodshot eyes indicating that he didn't sleep at all last night while you got a few hours at least.

"Thanks doll, would you mind? It would just give me time to process things as well," he says tiredly.

You nod and smile, leaning up to peck him on the cheek. "Of course."

And with that he disappears off into his room.

You spend the rest of the day just pottering around and entertaining the kids to try and distract yourself. Luckily the older ones don't even realise that you weren't back last night so don't ask and the younger three don't really think much of it.

You cook breakfast for everyone which actually manages to get Luke out of his room because of Petra dragging him out after her and you take some to Bucky as well. Unsurprisingly he hasn't gone to sleep, he's just curled up in a ball in the bed with the curtains closed. It's mid morning by the time you do that and you don't see him make an appearance the whole rest of the day.

When Isla asks where dad is you just tell her that he's sleeping because he's tired after last night and still has a headache and she doesn't think much else of it thankfully.

That night when you finally manage to crawl into bed next to Bucky, he turns over and opens his arms to welcome you in. Immediately you slip right into them, resting on your back with his head on your chest. There is silence for a minute as the two of you just hold each other, you lightly tracing your finger up and down the fading scar going right up the centre line of his abs and him stroking his metal finger up and down your back in a similar rhythm.