Poems...

Not my fault

You kicked me down

You through punches

And words

Around like they were nothing.

Lamps and bottles,

But you said you loved me.

You said,

You said,

You said. Yet all you did was took.

Took innocence,

Took my idea of love and trust..

You hit,

You kicked,

You'd never miss.

Knives flies,

My soul dies.

Slowly and quickly all at the same time,

Why am I still here. What am I doing?

I see this happening and I feel it even more.

You reassure yourself, your doing this

Because you love me.

Because you care,

I'm in the wrong,

No one cares only you,

No one will believe me,

Don't even bother telling,

You can't leave me, I love you. It's your fault.

Baby it's okay,

It's your doing!

I do it because I care!

2 years

Till I left you

Completely

10 months after

Till I stopped shaking

Flinching

At any sort of contact

15 months

Till my tears stopped flowing

At the nightmares but how can they be nightmares,

When it all happened?

I hate being afraid,

That you will get tired of your new girl,

And come find me.

Memories still haunt me,

Day in and day out.

I have to tell myself to

Relax some days, when I get up in the morning.

You don't know where I am.

You can't find me. I am alright.

It was not my fault. It is not my fault.

It's not my fault, it's not my fucking fault.

You keep haunting, threatening, trying to scare me, to make me come back even though you say you have a new girl. That she's way better then me.

She gives you everything you need,

Without you having to take.

But it's not my fault.

It's not my fucking fault.

I didn't deserve it.

I didn't.

I swear...