₥₳Đ ₩ØⱤⱠĐ -ot21

0.51

"You did WHAT?!", Jaemin exclaimed after he and the other boys had listened to Donghyuck's story. The said boy just lowered his head and nodded, "I know.. I'm so stupid."

"Don't you like.. Feel the same for him?', Renjun frowned slightly. What Donghyuck was telling him made no sense, if he liked Mark back.. Why reject him in the first place?

"Yeah I do.."

"Then why run away from him, without an explanation and breaking his heart?! You could've just said yes!", Jeno was the one to speak up now. They were still looking at their panicky friend in disbelief.

"It's not that simple!", Donghyuck groaned while rubbing his hands over his face in frustration, "I just can't love him like that!"

"Why not hyung?", Chenle softly wondered while looking at Donghyuck curiously. His intention was to be gentle and understanding towards his older friend, but it only made the male feel more uncomfortable.

"I don't have the feeling that he is in love with.. me", he slowly began, confusing the people in the room only more.

"What do you mean with him not being in love with you? HE CONFESSED TO YOU!!!", Jaemin pointed out as he looked a little puzzled. Being the romance freak he was, he never really experienced this type of problem. Not in dramas and not in real life, so it made it only more confusing to him.

"Never mind.. You and Mark won't understand.."

"Then make us understand hyung, I bet Mark hyung would've tried to understand too..", Jisung frowned slightly at the state of his friend, who shook his head and slowly stood up.

"I don't think you would understand my insecurities", Donghyuck backed away a little and then bolted out of the front door again. He ignored the screams of his friends as he started running again.

His legs were protesting, but he ignored that too. The boy had ran from the playground to the house of his friends and himself, now he was running away from that too. Maybe he needed to find a place where he could just be alone, in peace and get his shit together.

And so he ran, taking the bus back to the city again. There he plopped down on a seat, totally ignoring the girl next to him, who was now staring at him. "You don't look like you're okay, Donghyuck", the girl softly muttered making Donghyuck look at her in shock, only to finally recognize the girl.

"In Hyeong? What are you doing here?"

"Going back to my friends, but that doesn't matter", she turned around a bit to take a better look at Donghyuck, "What are YOU doing here?", then she gave him a soft warm smile.

"I.. I'm trying to understand my thoughts..", he smiled sheepishly, thinking that he sounded silly and that the girl would laugh at him. But she didn't, instead of that she patted him on the head softly.

"I hope you'll succeed.. Here is my stop, I don't think you'll be going to the police station tonight.. So I will just tell your friends not to worry okay?"

Donghyuck nodded thankfully "Yes.. Thank you so much", she only smiled once again and waved him goodbye before stepping out of the bus. "STAY SAFE!", was the last thing he heard from her, then he was alone with himself again. It was lonely, of course. Having your own negative thoughts as company isn't really cozy.

He sighed and waited until the bus came by it's last stop, there he got out and looked around him. He had never been here and maybe that was for the better (not thinking about the chances of him getting lost though). There would be nothing he could recognize or anything that would remember him of something.

Everything was still unknown for him, a mystery.

That feeling shouldn't be making him feel better, because it was frightening. But it still did. People walked passed him and at a moment he started walking with the crowd, he looked at the buildings and trees. At shops and restaurants he had never seen before. And after a while he decided to sit on a bench, that was randomly placed somewhere on the pavement.

After making himself a little more comfortable he decided to finally think about the reasons he had rejected Mark.

Donghyuck knew for sure that Mark and his hyungs would be mad at him, his younger friends too, probably. He was even mad at himself, why would he do that?

Things were going amazing and he kind of ruined the peaceful atmosphere. It was just that he was afraid and his fear overpowered the feeling of being loved.

It shouldn't be that way and Donghyuck knew that, of course he did.

But he was just scared, scared of himself.

The boy had spend days of listening to NCT 127's stories of when they were younger and it made him realize how much he had changed. And there also were the 'You used to love or hate this!' and 'You're so different now!' comments. They made Donghyuck unsure about himself. Unsure about how to act, what to do and what to say. Unsure about who he was.

He felt like he had morphed into a different person.

Into Haechan.

Of course, everyone changes over the years, but they all keep some parts of themselves. Just a few things that could never change about them. But for Donghyuck this wasn't the case, he felt like even the unchangeable parts of him were different now.

Years ago, he had lost everything and everyone he knew. He was forced to start over again. In a place that was different than where he used to be, with people that weren't the same as the people he grew up with.

The young boy felt like he was stuck in between two people; Lee Donghyuck and Lee Haechan.

Now Mark said; 'I love you' to him.

But the male didn't know if he was talking to Donghyuck or Haechan. Probably Donghyuck, since that was the person Mark knew the best.

But sadly Donghyuck didn't even know Donghyuck.

So how could someone love him, if he wasn't... him?