in between all things

Chapter Twenty-Two

"Levi, we need to get in."

Levi looked just past us at the line forming behind us outside the club. It had taken about a fifteen minute wait for us to reach Levi, so I would be super pissed if he refused Drew and I entry.

Drew elbowed me and leant into my ear, whispering in my ear. "Be nice, Ash."

I rolled my eyes and gestured for him to give persuading Levi a try. Drew glared at me and smiled at Levi, who just looked like he was loosing patience fast.

"I'll pay you." Drew said simply. I face palmed myself. Why didn't I think of that?

"Because your an idiot. Also shut up! I don't need you ruining my hard work." Drew whispered into my ear again, not without another glare.

"Hard work my ass." I said sarcastically.

Levi looked between us and sighed. "Because I actually don't mind you boys, I'll let you in for twenty. This is the last time though. Jace likes to push limits but I'm sure you boys know yes from no. Pay up, before the queue gets a little too rowdy."

I nodded swiftly and pulled out a creased twenty dollar bill from my pocket and handed it to Levi. Without another look Levi let us into the club. Once inside I glanced around seeing the all too familiar soundings. Couples dancing drunkenly, singles filling their loneliness with cheap booze and Damo enjoying himself filling the room with killer tunes.

"Ash, stop looking and let's go. The sooner we get home the better." Drew said gripping my arm and pulling me through the tight crowd towards Damo.

As we approached Damo, he looked at us cheekily. "Hey Drew!" He said to me.

Drew gave Damo a sceptical look. "I'm Drew, Damo. You know that."

Damo laughed. "I know. Your the more masculine one. Ash just looks like butch girl that has yet to reach puberty."

"I see you've gotten nicer. Where's Jace?" I said coldly. I do not look like a girl. Usually I forget that Damo and Jace are related, but it's times like this that the relation is hard to forget.

"Don't you know?" Said in fake confusion. For a guy that spent years rebelling against his lawyer parents, he sure was a shitty liar.

"We need to find him. Or if you can't tell us that, maybe tell us who Jace's new blonde friend is?" Drew said calmly.

Damo smirked. "Jace said you'll come and look for him. He said that Ash doesn't give up. Drew I don't think he wants to be found. He's finally escaped our parents, he's got a new life now." Damo explained, messing around the the DJ board.

I blinked at him slowly and disbelievingly. "Drew and I've spend the whole night asking around. Tell us something Damo."

Damo looked at me sadly. "Ash, you know I've always seen you as a little brother but Jace is my blood. I protect him before I tell you anything."

"He hasn't spoken to Ash for months. He called me and said basically nothing that we can use and now he won't pick up the phone. I know he's gotten involved with some of your friends and I love you man but that's not good for Jace." Drew said trying to keep hold of his patience. It was strange seeing him like this. Sometimes you forget that with all his self control he posses the same emotions as the rest of us. I hadn't really thought much on how Jace's disappearance had effected Drew much. Why am I so fucken selfish?

Damo shifted his weight onto his right leg and ran a hand through his pink tipped hair. "The blonde's name is Trey Carter. You remember that guy that was caught with a pound of weed years ago? Yeah that one." He said hesitantly. So much for protecting Jace, but thank god he didn't keep his mouth shut.

I sighed in relief. Finally, something to go on. But before I could thank Damo, doubt set in. Did I really want to find Jace now? Damo said he was happy and that he had a new life, did I really want to ruin that? I mean, ignoring someone for months kinda says something right?

As if he was reading my mind, Damo smiled at me tightly. "Don't go looking for him Ash. I know what's going on with you guys, I mean I've know for a while but it's not like you guys love each other. You'll move on like Jace has. Give yourself the chance."

Ouch, that hurt. Had Jace really moved on? I looked down at my feat and let the music fill my ears. 'A Million Lives' by Jake Miller was playing and I let myself sway with the music. I was sick of all this. Why couldn't just accept this? We're ghetto kids. We don't make commitments. We don't fall in love. We don't go looking for people that don't want to be found. Maybe I really did belong in the North Side with my dad.

Drew placed a cold hand on my shoulder, shaking me out of my thoughts. I looked up again and held Damo's gaze for a few seconds. Damo coughed and broke our stare. I was desperate to find something to say. Something that would bring comic relief. But even my sarcasm was failing me lately. I felt like I had nothing left.

"You guys should go. Ash looks tired." Damo said to Drew. I was surprised and angered by his words. Damo was usually the 'party no matter what' kinda guy so suggesting I sleep seemed completely foreign coming from his mouth.

"Don't talk about me like I'm not standing right here." I said forcefully. Yep. There's the anger.

Damo rolled his eyes. "I'm not kidding. Go sleep."

"We should go, Ash." Drew said, grabbing my arm again. I felt like I should have tried to break free of his grasp but it felt nice to be controlled. It felt nice to have someone care for me. I'd lost my parents and Jace's love, I couldn't loose Drew's.

If I did I'd be stuck with Delilah and that was something I didn't want. I mean, she wasn't that bad if you really got to know her. She was someone you were weary about telling your secrets too but you did it anyways - or at least I did. Everything except for Jace. Jace was like my North side secret. Or I guess, he was.

"Sure. Cya Damo." I mumbled, half heatedly. I let Drew pulled me through the crowd, watching his blonde head sway to the music as he tried not to bump into a lot of people. Although that wasn't very possible in the packed club. Once outside the club, we passed Levi who nodded at us. Well wasn't this a twenty dollars wasted.

Drew let go of my arm and we both started walking down high street, our eyes content on the footpath ahead of us. "I'm sorry, Ash." Drew said turning to look at me, breaking the silence.

I forced a smile. "I was stupid. This was stupid."

Drew looked at me sadly. "Don't say your stupid. You liked him, Ash. Having this happen would hurt."

"No shit sherlock."

Drew laughed and punched my shoulder softly. "Want to go see Macie?"

I looked at him weirdly. "Haven't you been content on us going home for the whole night? Or was that some other 17 year old, blonde know-it-all?"

Drew glared at me. "Who knows, it could have been Trey."

"Too soon brother." I said lightly. Although I was feeling far from it.

"Whatever. I just figured you'd want to see Macie. After all she's your bestfriend."

Oh my god. My brother's the best at accidental guilt trips. I shrugged and continued to look ahead of me. Drew probably wouldn't see Jace for all a while. All this time I've made everything about me and forgot about Drew's feelings. But then again I was conflicted. Drew basically ruined my life, shoulder he be the one guilty?

Sigh.

"You can go home. I'll see her by myself." I said coldly. I've decided to go with being angry at Drew. I was sick of feeling like people could hurt me so easily. I would forget about Jace. I would forget about my parents. I would just forget about every bad thing in my life and try and move on.

Key word: Try.