Lost Heart

Chapter 20 : Memories of Tears

Xiao zhan's family lawyer Ming Qu finally arrive while carry one clothes bag for Xiao zhan. "You can't wear this kind of hospital pajama to visit your parents, i take some clothes from your home but i don't know which one you prefer to wear, so i bring few clothes for you to choose." Lawyer Ming Qu pull out few clothes from the bag while waiting for Doctor Wang comeback to hospital from home to change his clothes, because last night Doctor Wang stay in hospital. Xiao zhan sigh and choose a simple white hoodie and grey long runner pants. Xiao zhan change his cloths after take bath, he walk and then sit on his bed while Lawyer Ming Qu comb his hair, "You sleep really long and become mute mannequin for so long, but nurses in this hospital always diligently trim and cut your hair, Xiao zhan are you really ready to walk out from this hospital?" Lawyer Ming Qu ask worriedly because actually all these time both of Xiao Zhan uncle and aunt hide the fact about Xiao zhan that become like now from public. all these times no one know any news about Xiao zhan until Xiao zhan's aunt spread rumor about Xiao zhan become mental patient and lost his mind until have to get special treatment. Lawyer Ming Qu really worry if Media found out Xiao zhan went out from Hospital, last time at court if Xiao zhan didn't fainted and they move him back with Wang yibo's car maybe the Media will trap him in front the ambulance because they get issue about Xiao zhan family legacy court case. Lawyer Ming Qu really worry if Xiao zhan will be collapse again when find out about rumor that all these time Xiao zhan get hospitalized in Mental hospital instead of the truth that Xiao zhan is mute and paralyzed and get torture by his own aunt and uncle.

The journey to the cemetery area a bit far from hospital and they have to eat their lunch inside the car near the gas station, Wang yibo at first suggest them to eat lunch at the cafe, but Lawyer Ming Qu refuse the idea and said they better eat inside the car because Xiao zhan still trauma to stay around other. But actually he really afraid if there are paparazzi around that could ruin more Xiao zhan's condition. Xiao zhan didn't type anything to reply or chat with any of them inside the car. He only silently eat butter toast that he request as meal instead of rice or noodles and it make Wang yibo sigh because he know how Xiao zhan try to be strong and try to eat even actually he really feel heavy inside his chest.

Xiao zhan walk carefully to approach the tombstone, he read clearly both of his parents names write on it and the other small tombstone beside it was his one and only younger sister. both of his knees almost give up but he try to holding on his breathe until he walk in front of the tomb stone, unconsciously Xiao zhan's tears fell while he carefully kneeling in front of his parents tomb stone, he didn't believe day like this will happen to him like now. Xiao zhan carefully run his hands palm on the letter that perfectly engraved on the tombstone. *why leave me alone? why didn't take me with you? i don't want life like this...* Xiao zhan whispering in his mind and he really broken, crying out his sorrow, the painful memories make his chest feel really heavy and the tears start blur his eyes. that night Xiao zhan on the way to their family vacation trip straight from his concert schedules, his father drive all of them because they know Xiao zhan already exhausted after the concert. Xiao zhan remember his mother even told him to sleep at the back seat, his younger sister even pat tenderly on his chest told him they will wake him up when they arrive at the hills village. but then their car suddenly lost control and all Xiao zhan remember he awake in panic just before their car hit by another car and almost fell into the cliff.

That night is terrible nightmare for Xiao zhan, he awake with pain on his body but his mother and younger sister hug him really tight. "Xiao zhan, don't sleep... open your eyes son." his mom voice try to make him stay awake, Xiao zhan groaning in pain on both of his legs, he saw all of them bleeding and he hardly could talk after coughing and some blood running out from his mouth. "Ma..." that is the last word Xiao zhan said before he let darkness knock him down and he awake when inside the ambulance, he could hear the paramedic told him not to move his hands and told him to stay calm before he hear them scream, "we lost him again, drive more faster!!" before he feel choking to breathe,vomit some blood and lost his conscious again. Xiao zhan crying harder in front of the tombstone and keep wipes both of his hands on the engraved name on the stone. he feel hard to breathe and suddenly limp almost hit his head on the stone if Wang yibo didn't catch him on time. "Xiao zhan... Xiao zhan..." Wang yibo call in panic shaking Xiao zhan that suddenly fainted in front of them while kneeling in front of the tombstone. "Lets move Xiao zhan to the car." lawyer Ming Qu suggest while help Wang yibo to carry Xiao zhan that suddenly faint to their car. Wang yibo wipe sweat and tears on Xiao zhan's face after the laid unconscious Xiao zhan at the back seat. "Uncle, please turn on the air conditioner and bring my bag at the front seat please." Wang yibo ask when saw Xiao zhan look uncomfortable. Lawyer Ming Qu just nod and get the bag after turn on their car so the temperature cooling down a bit. Wang yibo take out small bottle and syringe, he prepare it if Xiao zhan condition suddenly get worst. "What is that?" Lawyer Ming Qu ask curiously when saw Doctor Wang give injection on Xiao zhan's right arm "just some pain killer and could make him sleep peacefully, Xiao zhan still couldn't handle his trauma and that night accident still too painful for him to remember but he can't forget it too." Wang yibo sigh and feel touching too saw how broken Xiao zhan in the grave yard but try to be strong so he could pay his respect as Son for both of his parents and as elder brother to his younger sister. "That night when hospital call me, they told me Xiao zhan already fell into coma, both of his parents and also his younger sister couldn't make it, when ambulance arrive all of them already died except Xiao zhan that still breathing and bleeding a lot. Doctor told me, Xiao zan bleeding too much and miracle make him still breathing even he stay in coma after they almost lost him inside the ambulance on their way to hospital." Lawyer Ming Qu told Wang yibo about that night accident.

"i hear from nurses, Xiao zhan try several time to end his life." Wang yibo sigh when saw Xiao Zhan whimpering sadly in his sleep. "when he awake from coma, he still could talk but then, he really broken when we told him he is the only one that survive and still alive from that night car accident. that day Xiao zhan scream angrily and threw away everything near his bed, then out of sudden he look like in pain and holding on his chest and vomit some blood before fainted. after that he lost his voice, and then he feel more broken after police investigation told us, Xiao zhan's car get sabotaged by his own friend." Lawyer Ming Qu take deep breathe and try to stay calm to continue explain about Xiao zhan. "then what happen until Xiao zhan try to kill him self?" Wang yibo ask curiously because after wake up from coma Xiao zhan didn't try to kill him self. " this happen after his aunt said because of Xiao zhan's popularity all of that happen, because of him all his family become victim...that day Xiao zhan get really angry and stab him self with the knife that his aunt use to peel the apple. he stab him self several time but luckily Doctor safe him, they did safe his life but not his soul and mind. after that he try to overdose him self with random pills on his table, and even secretly slice his wrist under the blanket. when we found it, blood already soak his bed and we almost lost him again." Lawyer Ming Qu wipes his tears and sigh deeply when remember how broken young man in front of them that time. "But then his aunt use it as cover to hurt him again and again, he stop kill him self but his aunt did it to end his life right? too bad his aunt trick get revealed by the hospital cctv." Wang yi bo said while check on Xiao Zhan wrist and he sigh when saw small scar that left there from the past Xiao zhan's suicide attempt. "When first time his aunt request Xiao zhan to get gags and bondage, Xiao zhan look really angry and keep struggling to fight back but then after few days he become breathing mannequin just like when you saw him in the hospital." Lawyer Ming Qu end his story about Xiao Zhan and feel regret too because all of them fall in Fei Yu lin trick to tied Xiao zhan on bed and gags him like Mental hospital patient.