Nineteen

Chapter Sixty-Nine

We both sit in silence for nearly ten minutes when he speaks. "I feel incredibly nervous."
I feel the same way. "We shouldn't be nervous. In a way we know each other more than we think," I say in more of a joking way, but I'm also serious, I think.
I cringe at the memory of waking up beside of him after a night I can only hope was pleasant.
He smiles at my attempt. His teeth are bright and white. I love when he smiles out of pure emotion and not a fake grin.
What am I saying? I love his raw smile?
"You look great, by the way." He looks me up and down and I remember what I'm wearing. My outfit from the club is suddenly more uncomfortable than before.
"Thanks, Mac helped me pick it out," I say as I lift the fabric from my skin and let it drop back where it started from.
"Was he one of Clark's dumbass jock friends?" He asks as he lays back onto the bed.
"He is very nice. He danced with me and made me laugh," I say, defending my new friend.
He rolls his eyes. "He's practically Prince Charming, then."
I swat at him with my hand but he just grins. "Oh, and you're so perfect?"
"Pretty much," he says.
I grab a change of clothes from my drawer and walk to the closet to change. "So, are we staying here or at my place?" I hear from inside the tiny space.
"Why do you always think we have to spend the night together? Can we not just hangout during the day like normal people?" I say.
He doesn't respond for a moment, probably trying to think of a smart remark back to what I say. Instead, he surprises me by saying, "okay. I'll go home and then we can hangout tomorrow."
I walk out of the closet. "Okay. That sounds like a better plan." I fluff down my pajama pants.
He stands from the bed and looks almost disappointed. Almost.
I'm taken off guard when he walks over to me and kisses me goodbye. He's warm and familiar to me and I'm not as confused by the affection like I once was.
It can't be good for him, because I'm totally taken aback. I believe I even start to pull away. He doesn't seem to notice.
"I'll see you tomorrow," he says as he pulls away and walks to the door.
I don't respond as he opens and leaves the room, all before I can make out the last few minutes in my head.
I don't know who I am anymore. Two months ago, if you told me where I'd be today, I would have laughed and sworn you were mistaken me for someone else.
I crawl in the bed and I can feel my body instantly relax and it hurts. It feels like today was a whole week crammed into one. My bed has never felt better than it does right now.
I grab my phone to check it before I go to sleep, and I, surprised to see a text on the screen, regardless of what hour it is.
"We should hangout tomorrow, I miss your face!"
I cringe at the choice of words. Link knows I hate when people say that. I type him a ugly emoji and say "long night. I'll text you tomorrow." But I smile when it sends.
I remember being with him at the party. I don't know the whole string of events from the whole night and I am not sure that I want to.
I place my phone on charge and lay my head back onto the pillow. Within minutes I'm completely out of it and in a deep sleep.