Nineteen

Chapter Eighty-Seven

"Not good for me?" I repeat. He looks me in my eyes. His eyes are cold and dark.
"You're too different than me," he says, with no remorse.
I'm confused. "I thought you cared for me?"
I can fell he's getting angry with the process I'm trying to come up with. "Damn it, Emory, I don't want to see you again," he states as he pushes his hands to the sides of his head.
"But, why?" I whisper, mostly to myself.
He grabs the bridge of his nose and closes his eyes. "There's someone else."
My head spins fast. Faster than I believe my body can handle.
Someone else. Someone else.
In days he's offering me a trip out of here and now he's telling me that he doesn't want to see me again.
My head starts to spin with the realization of what he's doing. I instantly try to grab what dignity I have left. "Just go," I say.
He doesn't move. "Get out," I say again. "Leave me alone."
I stand before he does. "I practically rejected Link telling me that he loves me for this," I scoff, mostly to myself again.
He stands and rubs his hands down his jeans, but not before he slams his palms against my desk, making a loud thud. The door slam is the only thing left in my mind. I cry myself to sleep sometime later.

He reaches his hand out for me. I can't hide my smile. His smile is bright, much brighter than usual, and I don't know why. He's looking right through me. I wave my hand to show him that I'm here, but it's not me that he's focused on. My smile fades as I turn to see what he's looking at. It's a girl, but I can't tell who she is. She walks past me, grabbing his hand as they walk into the white curtain of light. I'm left alone, in the black shams.

When I wake up, it's dark outside. I peek past my shades to see that it's pouring the rain. My face is very sore, but I don't feel like bandaging it. I usually love the rain, but today it's just a mirror of how I feel.
I have a class today, but I email my teacher to let her know that I'm not feeling well. She sends me a link of my notes and wishes me the best.
I should go to class just to prove that I'm not sulking, but it's too easy when you make your own decisions. I need someone to push me and get me going.
I need to go out and do something to ease my mind. Remembering that it's only Wednesday, I push the thought away.
Someone else. Could he really have someone else? This whole time?
I can't say that I'm surprised. His friend Ryan used to make jokes about his loyalty all the time. I'm stupid to not of realized it earlier.
Someone else.
I lay on my side and glare out of my window at the rain. The sounds are soothing to sit and listen to. When I was little I would run with my older brothers as they slid into mud puddles, just to be yelled at my our mom. How I wish to be back when we could do that.
My phone rings a few times, but I make no point to answer it. I stare at the rain.
I'm perfectly fine cocooned into my blankets until someone knocks on my door. I almost decide to pretend that I'm not here, but I choose the other road of doing the right thing and just getting up.
I'm disappointed when I open the door.
"Holy shit, your face looks horrible," Bailey says.
I roll my eyes. "What do you need?"
"Clark sent me to check on you. He says he called, but you didn't answer," he says as he leans against the door frame.
"I was asleep," I lie.
"You should come back with me. This place is depressing," he says as he looks around behind me. "Have you seen a doctor over your face?"
"I'm fine," I say, " and yeah, I have."
"Well," he says as he stands back up, "I'm gonna have to tell everyone what I've seen here, so expect some visitors."
"What exactly do you see?"
"A sad and lonely girl," he grins to me. If he only knew. I fully expect him to tell everyone I'm depressed and can barely move.
I roll my eyes and shut the door in his face, only to hear him laughing from the other side.