Stuck in Kuroshitsuji

Chapter 41: Helena and Demetrius

Aviva POV

I woke up back in a room in the manor in the middle of the night. Must have gotten back after Mey-rin fell asleep. Sebastian changed me into a nightgown. I feel awful about running off to her grave. I got out of bed and put my slippers on. I put on a dressing gown, grabbed a blanket, and left my room.

I started to make my way to the library. It really is my safe place. I entered the library and walked to the fire place. I grabbed a pillow off a couch and matches above the fireplace. I sat down and lit the fireplace. I wrapped my blanket around me and stared at the fire.

The way he looked at me. His eyes...I sniffled. He's so disappointed in me. I wiped away a tear. I stood up and grabbed A Midsummer Night's Dream. I opened it and read by the fire for a while. When I got to Act II Scene II, a line stood out to me.

"'Stay, though thou kill me, sweet Demetrius.'" I said aloud.

"'I charge thee, hence, and do not haunt me thus.'" I heard. I jumped and turned to see Sebastian in the doorway. "Must you always leave your bed to read in the library, Miss Aviva?" He asked, picking up a chair and bringing next to me. He sat down.

"Libraries are my sanctuary." I said before looking back to the fire.

"Why is that?" He asked me.

"Books were my escape." I said before poking at the fire.

"Were?" He said.

"I used to need to escape my reality. Now they are for entertainment and amusement." I said.

"Why did that change?" He asked.

"I got this job." I said turning to him. "Ciel gave me the chance to start over. He gave me a reason to live...and people to live for." I said before turning back to the fire.

"May I ask you something?" He asked.

"You may." I said not looking away from the fire.

"How did you lose your family?" He asked.

"My father had a heart attack. He was 44. It was 3 days before we found him." I said before turning to face Sebastian.

"And your mother and grandmother?" He asked.

"Died in a fire while I was at school. The cause was never found." I said bluntly. He was silent for a moment.

"May I?" Sebastian asked, motioning for my book. I handed it to him and he opened it to where I left off.

Before I could ask why, he started reading to me. I smiled and moved closer to him. I propped myself up against his legs and looked up at him. I rested my head against his thigh and he looked down at me for a moment, his expression soft. His voice is so captivating. He's like a siren. I could listen to him read all night. Or just talk honestly

Why is he like this with me? I really pissed him off today. He's so kind to me. Why? I swear I'll never understand this demon. He's so gentle with me. There's no way he actually cares about me...right? I mean it would make sense. But he's a demon. I shouldn't even trust him! Why do I? And why do I want to? He treats me so differently from the rest of the staff. From everyone really. I like being with him. I really do and I don't know why. And it's a bit frustrating that I can't figure it out.