when a smile drops [ BrightWin | SarawaTine ]

page #05

11:40 p.m

i couldn't stop the smile on my lips when i entered the classroom and saw Bright on his seat. he waved his hand at me, greeting me a good morning, dusting off my chair, patting it, treating me like a child that needs caring.

i sat down and the air reeks of his perfume.

he smelled like the spring. there was a unique scent of sweet flowers mixed with mint.

maybe he noticed me trying to sniff his perfume. he intentionally moved his body towards me. our shoulders were brushing against each other and i was completely aware of the growing heat on my cheeks.

i was flustered and every time he touch me i would lose my breath.

after the discussions we went to the tree and relaxed under the shade. he was quiet and it's weird.

"Why did you not attend the class yesterday?" i asked while opening my lunch box.

he looked at me, grinned and casually snatched one of the bananas on my opened bag.

he peeled and eat it.

"Did you miss me?"

his lips were moving and so his jaw while chewing on the banana. i bit my lower lip, thinking what would his lips feel like.

i heard him giggle.

"N-no!" I blurted out and munched on the apples.

he was smiling. staring at the clouds, eating.

but he would drift off to the void and i could see on his eyes how lost he was like he is a wolf a stray in an unfamiliar place.

"It's my mom." he broke the silence.

"I needed to take care of her."

and i didn't ask him or talk anymore. we let the silence grow between us and feel what would the universe, at that moment, wanted for us.

sometimes there is goodness in silence. it brings peace and it pacifies all the noise on our head. it sedates the pain on our hearts and tells us to keep our nerves calm.

he was staring so soundly at the cloud formations and i was staring at him, too scared i couldn't reach his face and caress it with my fingers. tell him, it's ok, i've been living a life i never wanted and look, i'm here anyways.

maybe her mom was sick.

"Can you lend me your lap? I wanna lay down." he muttered.

i nodded my head and slowly he rested his head on my lap. i held my breath, reminding myself to just keep my cool and act like a good friend.

he closed his eyes and hid his hands on his pants' pocket. i noticed he left the upper first button on his uniform untouched and unbuttoned making a way for his bare skin; his chest revealed and my cheeks stained with blush.

i gulped the lump on my throat and took a long deep breath.

relax, win. relax.

Bright is an enigma and i find myself longing for a deeper discovery of this man. he may appear happy but there will always a day, sadness will settle on him and he wouldn't know how to handle it. i would be there for him like i was today lending my lap to a mysterious stranger.

i know people are different. we have different tolerance of the pain. sometimes the weaker ones are swallowed by the monsters we battle. i don't know where i could label myself. maybe i am barely holding on to the little glimpse of fading hope i have.

the fire on my heart was dying and he came to me when i didn't asked; adding woods on fire to keep my embers burning.

i wanted to touch him and my hand worked on its own granting my desire.

his hair was soft. his skin was tender.

i was filling the spaces on my fingers with his hair and letting my skin kiss his skin.

he smiled, eyes-closed.

i stopped and removed my hand on his head.

"No..." he whispered.

he opened his eyes and looked up at me. he was smiling and i couldn't smile because of the embarrassment i feel. my heart was beating so fast like it was swimming in caffeine; nervous and awake.

he held on my hands and put it on his head.

"Don't stop. I like how your hands feel on my head."

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