Meet Me in Amsterdam

Chapter 2: Nate

Fifth day here in Amsterdam yet it feels home. I've always wanted to go here. I feel alive and better. The past 3 years of my life were hmm I do not know, complicated? In a way that I am still grateful to have met new people in my life and brought change to me.

Drinking my tea at my favourite spot near the central station, I noticed a familiar face walking and taking pictures around. Seems like she just arrived. I drank the rest of my tea and walked toward her direction.

I was right that this lady is familiar. But I was not expecting it to be her. I guess you really don't know what's real until you feel. I felt ice cold, stuck in my position and felt something stabbing my chest.

When things started to be clear and I came back to senses, I didn't think twice and walked towards her. I couldn't help it. She still smells like a baby. My baby. I breathed heavily and when I finally had the urge to talk to her, I whispered.

I don't care what she thinks of me for doing this. I missed you silly. You don't know how much I've been meaning to see you. I almost lost hope.

This strong woman didn't even bother and chose not to notice me. Still the same girl. I just sang one of our favourite songs. Maybe she'll recognize my voice. I felt excited for her to face me. I just couldn't help but think of caressing her smooth face, hug her, touch her, annoy her, and talk to her like we used to.

The moment she turned around I felt my heart pounding quickly as if it was a beast wanting to get outside of a den. Her eyes, innocent as ever. Her tiny pointy nose. Her eyeliner that compliments her cute eyes. Her plump lips. And her chubby cheeks.

She started glaring at me and words slipped out of her mouth. It crushed me. She doesn't seem to remember me. As if nothing ever happened between us. As if I never existed in her world.

"Not me, mister." Saying her final statement, I laughed. I just laughed the heck out of me because it's just too hard to stop tears. Heartbreaking baby. How could this happen to us?

After laughing I just turned around, and tears then started falling from my eyes. A real man cries. It's real. She's here. Xyleena's in Amsterdam. She's definitely fine as how I have seen her just a moment ago. Except for the fact that she didn't recognize me. Not my voice, not my appearance, and not even my existence.

Walking back to my hotel, I just couldn't help but bury myself in loneliness. That was one of the most heartbreaking minutes of my life. Rough and solid. It hit me hard.

I thought I'm ready. I thought I have moved on. I thought we were never meant to cross paths again. All were just thoughts. Silly brain. Silly heart.

I remember her eyes. The way it used to gaze at me before. With care, bliss, and love. I remember her lips. The way she pouts when she wanted my attention whenever I'm busy or playing. The way she laughs with her mouth wide open not minding her lady boss ego. The way she smiles and mess with me.

The way she dances awfully and carelessly. The times she argues about stupid and nonsense topics. The times she cries for being a sensitive baby of mine. The way she clings to me. And everything we used to be.

I guess our "Meet me in Amsterdam" finally came to reality. It's just miserable. But I'll make you remember sweetie. I don't care how and where. I can't let this opportunity slip away. I can't afford to lose you. Not again.

I opened my eyes and I got my phone to check the time. My eyes feels puffy and my body's heavy. Damn it. It wasn't a dream Nate. You're screwed.

Before I even managed to get up, my phone rang so I picked up the call. "Hi babe! How's Amsterdam? How's my baby? I just finished my work for today. I'm heading to bestie right now. Any news?"

And I remembered. Reality slapped me. I have Krisha. Another heartache for mister Nate it is.