Starting Over

39. Guys, Come On

I don't see Jackson at all for the rest of the day. As I make my way to my car, I get a phone call. Jeremy is calling.

"Hey," I greet unlocking my car and getting in.

"Hey, everything okay?" he asks, I turn my car on but I won't go anywhere until I'm off the phone.

"Yeah, why wouldn't it be?" I ask.

"Pft, come on Ell, I'm your twin for heaven's sake. What's happened with Jackson?"

"It's not because you're my twin Jeremy, It's because Jackson has told you something hasn't he?" I push.

Jeremy says fuck under his breath. "Okay, yeah. He messaged me. He said he stuffed up." Jeremy explains.

"He got that fucking right," Jeremy is quiet for a bit. I check the time and realise its almost three o'clock and it takes 45 minutes to get to Dr. browns office. "Look Jeremy, I've got an appointment. I'll call you when I get home." We say our goodbyes and hang up. I drive out of the school parking, heading towards the clinic mentally preparing myself for this godawful appointment.

***

"Sorry hun, I won't be too much longer," Dr. Brown says as she doing her examination causing me a bit of pain.

I got to Dr, Browns office ten minutes late to my appointment. I explained why I was late and she understood completely. She started with the check up to get it out of the way and send off any tests that need to be sent off for results so that way they'll be ready once the appointment is over.

Dr. Brown finishes up, letting me know to put my clothes back on and sit on one of the chairs once I'm done.

I do as I'm told and Dr. Brown leaves her office. She comes back but not on her own.

"What is he doing here?" I ask as she sits down at her desk and Jackson sits on the chair next to me.

"He rang me earlier today to make sure I wouldn't let you cancel your appointment," she explains.

I scoff. "Why? Why couldn't I cancel my appointment?" I ask turning my back forth between the two.

"Because if you won't let me see you than this is the only way I could see you without you running away and I'm not gonna lie, but this might actually help us," Jackson says quietly not looking me in the eyes.

"No Jackson, you had your chance to tell me what your problem was but you never used it so don't tell me that whatever you have planned here might help us!" I argue pointing my finger at him. Dr. Brown clears her throat.

"Guys, come on," she cuts in. "What is going in between you two?" She asks distressed.

Jackson opens his mouth but I'm not letting him explain. "Last night he asked what my pills were for so I told him. After I told him about the ones for my lady area he went cold and standoffish. He walked away and upstairs to the balcony and I followed him. I then asked what was wrong and he said nothing which I didn't believe but I went to bed anyway." I pause to look at Jackson. He's staring at the books behind Dr Brown in a completely other world. "This morning I woke up to an empty bed which was weird because I didn't think it was that bad that he wouldn't come to bed with me. Anyways, I went through the whole house to find him and I saw a blanket and pillow on the couch downstairs indicating to me that he was sleeping in the couch," Dr. Brown nods her head as a cue to keep going. "I found him outside with his headphones on. I was so worried that he had left or something had happened to him," I take a deep breath.

"I asked why he slept on the couch last night and his response was that he didn't want to wake me up last night when he came back inside. Which I thought was absolute bullshit! So of course, I lost my shit and told him to drive himself to school and that I was cancelling today's appointment." I stop again to watch Dr Brown soak in all that I've told her. Jackson still hasn't moved or said anything.