Moon and Stars || OT7

A Promise

November 2019

"I didn't know that getting high would set that off... I don't know what happened. One moment everything was hilarious and the next I thought for sure my parents would come and... and... beat me..."

Moonhae sits in an armchair across from Taehyung with her knees tucked up under her chin, explaining everything that went through her mind that night. Although it's a huge step out of her comfort zone to share things like this from her past, his attentiveness and soft-spoken nature helps her through all of it. More than anything he wants to know everything about her so he can protect her and take the pain away, but he doesn't want to push her too far.

"So you felt like you were fourteen again?", he looks at her with sorrow in his eyes as she fidgets nervously.

"Yeah... It was like I was in that head-space again and I couldn't get out. I'm just sorry I pulled you into all of this. I said some pretty fucked up shit", she pulls her sleeves further over her hands.

"You didn't pull me into anything. I'm here for you, okay? I don't ever want you to feel like you have to keep something from me", he assures her with an earnest expression, "I'm glad Namjoon was here though, because I had no idea what you were going through."

"I just don't really talk about me growing up, because I want to forget. Namjoon knew me at the time though, so he knows what um... my parents were like", she speaks hesitantly, but fairly emotionless considering all the hurt she must be feeling.

Taehyung looks pained as he gazes at her struggling form. She knows he's too kind to ask what her parents could've possibly done to mess her up so badly. Although she doesn't want to talk about it, she owes him at least something.

"When I was young we didn't have a lot of money", she starts on one of her childhood stories, "My parents struggled a lot and people kept complimenting their daughter saying how she could be model or an idol. I was maybe ten years old when they thought it was a good idea to take... take these pictures of me. Um... They dressed me up or barely dressed me... And took pictures to sell them to older men..."

"Moonhae!", Taehyung gasps, his heart breaking all over again. He immediately leans forward to place a comforting hand on her arm. "They could go to jail for that!"

"I know, but... They're still my parents. I don't want to send them to jail, so I just stay away from them instead", she murmurs, "Until I became a trainee I thought my life would always look like that, so I was very... um... Not in love with the idea of living? My friends at the time, including Namjoon, we did stupid things to distract ourselves from how we really felt. It wasn't good, but at least we made it through, right?"

"Moonhae... Don't take this the wrong way, but... Have you ever considered therapy?", he's scared to bring it up, but is genuinely concerned for her mental wellbeing that's been a burden to her for years.

"I'm not gonna spend an hour every week talking about my feelings to some floozy that somehow obtained a PhD", she snaps, always having hated the idea.

"But it's not just your parents... It's your past relationships and the fact that you were almost murdered that you still haven't been able to work through properly", he urges her once again.

The idea of therapy has been deemed unconventional and unnecessary in Korea for a long time and yet they see some of the highest suicide rates every year. It's something that has bothered Taehyung to the bone and he knows that some people, especially with trauma, need to talk it through so they can work through it and let go. He's lost one too many friends in the industry already.

"Look, I know I'm a handful", she inhales shakily, "And maybe... Maybe it's just better if... If you're not in a relationship with someone like me. I know I told you in the beginning none of this would be easy, but this is obviously not what you bargained for."