𝐆!𝐏 𝐈𝐦𝐚𝐠𝐢𝐧𝐞𝐬 - 𝐁.𝐄

Grief

(1572)

TRIGGER WARNING!

I'm sorry in advance. I cried while writing this.

NOT EDITED CUZ ITS 2AM!!!

I stare at the comforter on my bed, with a pain in my chest that only comes this time of year. A pain that's so excruciating that I wanna scream but can't. I wanna sob, but no tears come. I wanna punch something, but I can't move. It's like I'm locked in a prison within myself that traps my emotions inside, only making the pain worse.

Grief. It's a hard thing. Something I don't wish upon my worst enemy. It's a pain so bad that you just wanna rip your hair out just so you can focus on another source of pain. In the hopes that maybe, just maybe, it will hurt more that the one that aches throughout your whole body.

You can't breathe, you can't focus, you can't think. All you can feel, see, and know is the pain. I never thought it would feel this way. I never had to lose someone. When I thought about the possibility, I didn't think it would be her.

My everything. Taken from me in a split second.

My world, crashing down with the sound of a sob on the other end of a horrible phone call.

Nothing in my life could have prepared me for it.

~

I'm in the kitchen, as I cook dinner. Waiting for her to get home. Shes been gone all day. We had an argument and said some hurtful things, so I wanna make it up to her.

As I take the Brussels out of the oven, I look up at the clock on the stove. 9:41 pm. Guess she's a little late. Shes usually home by 9:15.

~

I should've called. I should've done something. Instead of trying to kiss up and try and get her to forgive me and thinking if my own wants, i should've called. To make sure she was okay, and safe.

But I didn't.

~

I set the table, about 10 minutes ago. I let out a frustrated sigh as I look at the clock again. 10:09 pm.

I just start to eat, not caring if she came home or not anymore.

Once I'm done, I throw her untouched plate of food in the trash, and the plates in the sink.

I walk into our room, kicking my shoes off and laying down. I grab her pillow, bringing it to my chest. Her scent fills my nose, making me smile.

Just as I feel my eyes getting heavier, I hear my phone go off. I look at the time.

10:47 pm

Hello?

And just like that.

Everything in my life crumbled. She was gone.

~

Everyone says it's not my fault.

But it is.

She crashed into a tree. They found 7 beer cans, and half a bottle of whiskey.

She was drunk.