Twisted Perfection ~ Everlark

Goodbye for now.

Katniss' PoV:
I smile at him. He smiles at me.

"Hey." He says gingerly. He's probably terrified of me right now, because he feels as though he's going to hurt me.

I smile at him.

"How are you feeling?" He asks.

I try to nod my head, but my neck brace intervenes.

"They told me I'm going back to the Capitol. I'm nervous, I won't lie." He says.

I smile but become sick of it so I decide to try to speak, even though the doctors said I shouldn't.

I close my eyes and take a deep breath before trying to speak.

"Yo..." at first my words are strained, but I persevere.

"You don't need to apologise." I whisper.

"That wasn't you Peeta...If you need forgiveness...I'll give it to you." I say, straining my words.

By now my throat is on fire, but I don't care. I need to talk.

"I thought the doctors told you not to talk." He says.

I shrug my shoulders.

"The...these could be...my last....words to you for...2 years." I say, straining my voice.

"I won't be gone that long Katniss. Only a few months at the most." He says. I can tell he only said that to calm me down.

"Just try...to get better. Don't...worry...about me." I say.

Tears start to collect in his eyes. I walk slowly over to him and sit on the bed with him. I place my hand on his shoulder and he instantly starts sobbing. I've never really seen Peeta cry. Even when he has his nightmares, the aftermath is always just heavy breathing or a few whimpers, but nothing like this.

"I hurt you Katniss. I've hurt you so much." He says in between his sobs. My heart throbs at him being in pain and suffering.

"I'm okay Peeta." I say, trying to restrain my voice.

He collects himself after a few minutes and wipes his tears, staring into my eyes.

"You'll have Haymitch to keep you company." He says. I laugh at the notion of Haymitch being there to comfort me at nights, but I know his way of calming me down will be via a bottle of liquor and then go to sleep, which I am not going to do.

"Why don't you try and contact your mother?" He asks. I think about it for a moment. I haven't talked to my mother in months. Ever since Prim passed, I had an inkling that she would be like this. I know I'm not the daughter she wanted to end up with.

"I will." I say, trying not to over complicate things with my voice.

A few moments go by, until Peeta dries his eyes and rests his head on my shoulder. It feels so calming to have his touch back again.

"I'm sorry." He says sniffling.

"I'm sorry for doing this to you all over again. I'm sorry for not being there for you when you needed me the most." He says.

"It's...okay Peeta." I say. A tear collects in my eyes and it falls onto my cheek.

For a few minutes we sit in silence, until Peeta shuffles around in his sat position.

"What if I never get better?" He asks. "What if I keep on hurting you?"

"It's not you who's hurting me Peeta." I say. "That's not you."

"But it is. I know my mind is somewhere else, but it's me who's doing it." He pauses for moment. I can't really justify his point.

"I'm so weak, I can't even stop it." He says. My heart throbs. It's the one thing besides grief that pulls at my heart: Peeta being upset. "Life just gets too much for me sometimes. I feel so worthless and weak against it. It's so hard to fight."

My heart throbs at the sound and sight of him giving up. The Peeta I know, never gives up. He always perseveres.

"Hey. Life doesn't get easier, you just get stronger."

I hope you liked this chapter! The next few will become interesting with who Katniss will talk to when Peeta's away. Please comment and give feedback because I don't know how I'm doing otherwise, Annie x