Mizpah: Jillian

Chapter 2

It was midmorning and I had a head that felt like an axe was planted in it. Hindi naman ako lasing kagabi pero masakit talaga ang ulo ko. Maybe because I skipped lunch and dinner yesterday?

My eyesight struggled to cope with the daylight so I covered myself with a blanket that I saw from the cabinet last night.

I uncovered myself from the blanket when I remember the guy from last night. I appreciate the words he said to me last night.

I've done my morning rituals which includes taking a bath. I dried my hair using a towel while deciding what to eat for breakfast.

Kinuha ko 'yung cellophane na pinaglagyan ng mga pinamili ko sa grocery kagabi.

Instant noodles. I guess it's okay. It's the second time that I ate it. The first time was when I was in fourth grade. I visited my friend which happened to be my yaya's daughter in their house and our snack that time was instant noodles.

Kumulo na ang niluto kong noodles at maingat ko itong nilagay sa isang malaking bowl na nakita ko sa kabinet. I sat down and started eating.

Habang kumakain, hindi ko mapigilang mapatingin sa paligid ng apartment ko. Hindi ako sanay na walang magsisilbi sa akin. But I think I will get used to it. I have to.

I'm pretty sure that the size of this entire apartment has the same size of my room. Just my room alone. Kanina habang nasa cr ako, wala man lang heater or what. I even noticed na may mga buhangin pa sa tubig mula sa gripo. It's not nice.

I opened my phone at agad namang bumilis ang tibok ng puso ko when I read Cale's messages from last night.

From: Cale
Ipapahanap talaga kita, Jillian! Fuck! I'm so damn worried about you.

From: Cale
Call me when you read this text. Please.

From: Cale
Did you eat? Saang hotel ka ba naka-stay ngayon? Don't tell you're in abroad. Send me the address so that I can at least see you.

Abroad? I'm not dumb to go there. Alam kong mate-trace nila ako.

From: Cale
Okay... Hindi kita pipiliting umuwi dito sa bahay but can I at least know if you're doing good? Please, Jillian.

I gulped before I typed my message.

To: Cale
I'm doing fine here. You don't need to worry about me. I'll call you later.

Napapikit ako habang pinindot ang 'sent' button. I felt bad for Cale for making him worry about me but I can't just return to our house. Lalong-lalo na na masama ang loob ko kay Dad. What he did was wrong. Very wrong.

Agad kong niligpit ang pinagkainan ko without doing the dishes. I rolled my eyes. God! I hate washing dishes.

I took a deep sigh when I saw that I don't even have a soap or any stuff here in my apartment.

Before I went outside, nagbihis muna ako ng isang gray t-shirt and black maong shorts paired with a slippers. Kahit labag man sa kalooban ko na magsuot ng mga damit na ito, I left with no choice.

I noticed kasi when I was outside yesterday, people here wear this kind of clothing. Like t-shirts and pants or shorts. But I guess there's no wrong with what I wear kasi kahit simpleng t-shirt lang ito at short sa paningin ng ibang tao, trust me... They'll be shocked when I told them the brands of my outfit.

My wardrobe back in my house was full of authentic and designer items, and most of them are dresses. Napaka-flashy ko naman para magsuot ng Vivienne Westwood dress dito sa kitid-kitid na place.

Paglabas ko mula sa pinto ng apartment ko, bumungad sa akin ang napaka-init na araw na sinabayan pa ng ingay.

Sa loob ng compound, may mga babaeng mas matanda na nagtitipok-tipok sa labas habang nagkwe-kwentuhan. Sa gilid naman, sa may ilalim ng puno ay mga tambay na nag-iingay na sa tingin ko ay mag-iinom na naman.