Jackrene Oneshots

At her expense

She should have kept her distance from the start. She knew every moment was false yet she believed it was real. She deluded herself to believe it was real over the years they had been together .

"Don't fall for me." He had told her. Warned her actually

But how could she not.

How could she resist loving him?

When it was the very bane of his existence that had the capability of lighting up her mood. When he made sure to be there when she needed to talk, to download, when she needed someone to listen, he was the first to sit in front of her and listen to it all, he would be sure never to impose his opinion, he would listen and let her express the doubts that had nibbled away at her tormented heart.

How could she not fall for him when he would be up in the morning cooking her breakfast, driving her to her shoots and to the studio?

How could she not fall in love with the way he interacted with her friends building up bridges that would ultimately burn?

How could she not fall in love with the way his hand ghosted her waist through it all?

How could she not fall in love when they had made love?

How can she not give into him when he gave her every reason to do just that?

And now.

Exactly three years later since she had walked down the aisle straight into his arms, entering a marriage that was on the foundation of business, the source of a transaction. He handed her the stack of divorce papers, his name already imprinted onto the black line at the bottom of the numerous words that made her heart quench with every breath she took. She realises in that moment as she bravely looked up at him for the last time that he wouldn't just be taking his name back with him but unknowingly taking her heart as well. Her name stands with his on the paper, the Wang turning back to Bae as she hands it back over to him leaving the room and crashing into their bed moments later. She was no longer Mrs Wang, Mrs Irene Wang. Her new found identity had been snatched without her say.

She moves out a day later.

She seems him months later at a Fendi shop. He looks better she noticed. Happier. Lighter. She turns slightly as she is brought face to face with owner, a man who was there at their wedding. She converses politely with him. Her eyes looking over to Jackson who was radiating, her tiny voice taunting her that he had another who was looking after him better than she could. He turns as she turns to look back at the man in front of her, smiling and responding to his questions, her hands trailing the material that the man wanted to show her as part of a female collection he was releasing. She compliments it. She smiles, eyeing the door wanting to escape as fast as she could. She's one step away from just that when he calls her name. His voice causing her to close her eyes. A voice that was home. She faces him with a small smile. A pained smile, arms crossing against her chest like a defence as he smiles at her. He sees in that instant how her confident, bright aura has dimmed. "How are you?" He asked. The question brings tears to her eyes, but she wouldn't break. Not in front of him. Not now. She looks up to him. "Surviving." She answered not waiting for a response, or bothering to redirect the question. She just leaves. The same way her heart was left.

She receives a message from him two days later.

From Jackson
Within the three years we were together I never thought I'd be happy with you. But I was. I enjoyed every single moment with you. Every mini journey we took together, I loved it. I know my actions crossed the boundaries we had set to stay as friends and I'm sorry for that, I'm sorry for the hurt I caused you over the years and even now that I walked away. I hated how we were forced into the marriage without a choice. They took our freedom from us and I resented that. I wanted to hate you but found that I couldn't especially when you had looked me in the eye and told me that the minute I want to let go you would allow it no questions asked. I started to hate myself more knowing that I was falling for you more and more each day. I know that I've utterly fucked up. I know I've broken your heart and don't deserve for that door to open again, I don't deserve for the door to your heart to open back up to me and it's okay. I needed to let go to find myself and I have. I'm better. And you deserve the same chance of healing from what I put you though, but if you decide I'm worth allowing to help you heal those wounds I will do it in a heart beat. You were the best wife I could have asked for. And you deserve better than me. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, I love you.

From Irene
You let your pride and ego get in the way of something pure Jackson. This was a second chance for you....for us and you blew it. You hated that it worked out because you wanted a reason to cling onto the hate. You know what? I wish that you hadn't kissed me that night when we were in Vietnam together. I wish we had never made love the way we did over and over again until my heart became yours. I wish you hadn't held my hand and whispered your sweet nothings if you had intentions to leave that very same hand. I wish you hadn't mentioned kids that one night in New York when we were there for your 100 ways tour. But most of all I wish I hadn't given my heart to you because now I can't get it back. I was ready to spend the rest of my life with you. I was ready to try and that was the difference between me and you, I loved more than you. I held on whilst you let go. You held onto your anger and resentment towards our parents for a marriage which wasn't even that bad whilst I tried hard to make the best out of the worst possible situation. I carried that relationship Jackson so...Don't tell me you love me when you made the choice to leave. Don't tell me you love me when that's all I wanted to hear for months, three words, eight  letters and three syllables that I yearned to hear form you since I walked down the isle. Don't tell me you love me when I'm beginning to come out of it. When I'm begging to unlove you.

She doesn't wait for a response. She blocks him the next second, her hand ghosting to her stomach, a tear slipping from her eyes. "It's just me and you baby. Just me and you."

The end

Authors note:
Okay don't hate me for this one. A little angst one for you all. Hope you enjoy this. Let me know what your thoughts are about this update. Lots of love and best wishes to you all.