This Might End Up A Story

[19.3] The Lonely Hearts Club iii

whatever the mess you are
you're mine, okay?

— challengers ~ the new pornographers

*

When Vivien opened her eyes she saw another set staring back at her. A familiar set of brown eyes she'd come to recognize from hallways and quiet libraries for the past seven months. Eyes she'd learned to search for in every corner of the campus.

Vivien had always liked Bren's eyes.

Bren's, her hazy mind supplied. Or Badong's?

Sino nga ba talaga ang lalaking 'to?

"Oh my god, Yen!" the panicked voice of her mom brought her back to her senses. Dahan-dahan siyang umupo nang maayos, medyo hilo pa, at it took her a moment to realize na nasa isang maliit na opisina sila. A warm hand enveloped hers, the sensation jolting her awake. "Anak, are you okay?!" her mom asked again.

Inikot niya ang paningin sa loob ng kwarto, totally avoiding the other pair of eyes watching her. So nasa restaurant pa rin sila, probably inside the manager's office or something. She could hear the bustling sound of the kitchen and the chatters outside. Valentine's Day pa rin today.

Pero shit, bakit may nagpaparamdam na multo ng nakaraan?

"Hija, are you okay?" si Mrs. Barrios naman ang nagtanong, sporting a concerned look that churned her insides. "Do you want to go to the hospital?"

Marahan siyang umiling, which was still a bad move dahil mas nahilo siya. "O-okay lang po ako. I'm sorry, Ma. I'm—"

"May sakit ka ba?" tanong ng mama niya. "Have you been sleeping well? Kumakain ba kayo ni Barbs nang tama? Gusto mo bang dalhin ka namin sa ospital?"

"Ma, okay lang po talaga ako. I must be tired from yesterday's activities," she lied. In fairness, mas gumagaling na siya sa pagsisinungaling. Ganito ba talaga 'yon, mas kapani-paniwala na ang mga kasinungalingan pag marami kang experience? Umayos siya ng upo at hinawakan nang mahigpit ang kamay ng mama niya. "Sorry for not telling you, Ma. Nagpahinga na ako kanina bago niyo ako sunduin. I thought that was enough."

"Naku mabuti pang i-reschedule na lang natin 'to, Amy," sabi ni Mrs. Barrios sa tabi niya. "She must rest now, baka kung mapaano pa siy—"

"Okay lang po ako promise! " she insisted. "Sorry po nakaabala pa ako sa lakad niyo."

Sa totoo lang, gustung-gusto na niya umuwi kaso naalala niya ang excitement ng mama niya sa meeting na 'to. She's been looking forward to this day for months, at minsan lang makipagkita ang nanay niya sa mga kaibigan nito. It wouldn't hurt if titiisin niya ang isang gabi na kasama ang isang multo ng nakaraan, 'di ba?

"Ah ano ka ba, hija. Don't worry about us! I'll be staying here for good so mandalas na kaming magkikita ng mama mo." Mrs. Barrios smiled at her, that familiar understanding smile na binibigay ng isang lola sa apo niya, and for a second namiss ni Vivien ang lola niya. "We can just meet some other time. Health is more important than chika."

Vivien turned to her mom na nag-aaalala pa rin sa kanya. "Ma, I swear I'm okay. Ituloy niyo na lang po ang dinner niyo tapos uuwi na lang ako."

"Pero nak—"

"Please, Ma? I don't want to spoil this night for you. Sobrang excited ka pa naman makipagchikahan."

Napangiti ang mama niya doon. "Sure kang okay ka? Pwede kita ipahatid sa driver if you like."

She shook her head. "Wag na. Baka mastuck pa siya sa traffic pabalik dito, ma-hassle ka pa sa pagbalik sa 'tin. May dumadaan namang jeep dya—"

"Oh no, hija. You can't commute if you're not feeling well!" sabat ni Mrs. Barrios. She motioned her grandson to stand next to her, na kumilos din kaagad.. Umiwasng tingin si Vivien. "Ba, can you at least drive her back to her dorm? Tama ba hija, naka-dorm ka?"