Newly Not Cis

How to Deal With Idiots

Jamie had a boyfriend. The thing he was most scared of. Something he never thought would happen or could happen. He had a boyfriend and he was ecstatic about it. There was still so much to do before tomorrow. So much he still needed to tell and explain to Katie, Ben and Lachie, but here he was, blushing and freaking out over having a boyfriend. If he wasn't so panicked, he would probably be freaking out over how he's acting like a schoolgirl, but he couldn't, Nick was there. A guy who despite everything, still somehow thought of Jamie as a guy, and one worth crushing on.  So what if Jamie had had multiple nightmares about this situation? So what if people would eventually see him as Nick's girlfriend? He couldn't help but smile. Something good had come out of this awful time experience and he wanted to bask in it. 

"I do. I'm just sorry I'll be seen as your girlfriend."

"That's another thing. Should I call you a girl? I mean, do you want me to use she/her pronouns?" He didn't. Hell, he didn't want to talk about any of this, when he could just be talking to his boyfriend and figuring out how to deal with his newly figured out sexuality.

"I need to get used to being called a girl."

"I don't want to misgender my boyfriend, dude." His boyfriend. That was him. Why did being called his boyfriend feel so fucking good?

"At least in public?" Jamie asked. Nick's concern was touching, but he needed to learn.

"I can do that. I'm sorry." 

"It's okay. I need to get used to it. I'm gonna be wearing a dress tomorrow and I doubt Lachie and Ben will be too worried about misgendering me."

"How are you going to tell them?"

"I'm gonna post in announcements. It's probably the best place to start I guess. Is it okay if we stay on call while I tell them?" It felt like he was giving into femininity and becoming weak by asking for help, but was that even worth worrying about when he was wearing a dress and talking to his boyfriend? This was stressful. Support was going to be important.

"Of course."

Jamie figured the best place to start was by posting a picture. Seeing is believing when it came to these guys and they weren't going to believe him unless he posted that picture first. Looking at it hurt. He might have asked for the new changes but they were still terrifying to see. His soft face, his long hair; he couldn't recognise himself anymore. There was nothing left of James in there. It was just Jamie.

Ben: Who's that?

A reasonable question. Jamie was unrecognizable.

Jamie: That's me.

Ben: Holy shit, are you serious? Is that a filter or something?

Now the fun part of explaining he now has tits.

"Fucking hell. I just realised I can't convince them the same way I convinced everyone else."

"What do you mean?"

"People only believed me before this cause I showed them my chest. I mean, can you imagine what would have happened if they found me as you did?" Jamie shivered just thinking about it.

"Just say, 'I woke up as a girl' or something."

Jamie: I wish. I woke up as a girl two weeks ago. That's why my voice has been weird.

Ben: You've been spending too much time with the freaks, James.

Jamie: Ben, look at that picture. Does it look like I'm joking here?