Red and Violent ✔️

Chapter 29: Is This Love?

Ae Ra finally arrived. She sat with doctor Dana before meeting you. She was only going to spend the day with you and all her conversations with you were to be monitored. That's the protocol for the next couple of days. By the end of the week you'll be evaluated for whether you're fit to go back to work or not. You were slowly recovering. The moment you saw Ae Ra she was already cursing.

"Bitch, I know you said you're rich but damn look at this house!" She praised the technology of the house and how big it is. You laughed. For the very first time in the past three days you finally did.

"Come here!" You motioned for her to sit next to you and the moment she sat down you tackled her into a hug. You held on to her so tight. You haven't seen her or talked to her for a while and her being there made you feel safer. You both laughed. She didn't break the hug. She just stayed there.

"Girl, is your brother single because I'm so ready to tap that." She bit her lower lip. You bumped your fist to her shoulder.

"All you think of: money and getting laid." You laughed.

"Well let's be frank here. We all want money and sex."

"Fair enough." You shrugged. She laughed again and buried herself into your hug.

"How are you feeling?" She asked in her familiar tone. Her coming all the way here made you feel loved. That girl was there in every single moment and she never whined. You kissed her cheek.

"With all honesty? I wanna kill a bitch." You could finally vent the way you always did when you were with her. She jumped up and clapped once.

"Where are the guns?" She said with a straight face. You shook your head as you laughed and pulled her back next to you.

"I love you. I miss you." The only person you felt safe enough to utter these words respectively and not feel like you're making a statement. You didn't need protection from her. She was the protection.

"I love you. I miss you." She repeated as she sat up. "Let me braid your hair and talk about boys." You submissively and happily sat down under her feet and let her brush your hair. "How's the sexy maknae? Spill that tea!"

"I miss him." The word was blurted out and you almost wanted to catch it mid air and put it back. "Fuck this! Ae Ra? I want to break up with him." You said in decision. She knew you had something else to say. So she just waited for you to continue. "He's too good. I mean, someone leaked to me that he called. He fucking stayed after seeing me panic, seeing me cry. That's just not normal!"

"Uh, yeah, because everyone is your Don fucker who was up to no good." She said sarcastically, referring to your ex-boyfriend who left once he saw you after coming back from London; broken by your dad's passing away.

"Well, there's something about Jungkook that makes me want to end it. He's too young. He's not going to get it. He might be accepting the shell, but whenever this shell is to be broken for him to see the core, it'll blow off and kill us all. It will kill me. He'll see me differently and I don't want the man I love seeing me differently." You stopped.

'What the fuck did I just say?'

"I meant like." You were thinking of everything and it's antonym. Your brain couldn't grasp anything remotely logic when it came to him. You were running away from your fears, not him. And your fears wanted you to run away from him; logical or not. Fears sucked him up and made him a terror of his own.

"Yes, sure, that's a slight mistake you'd normally make because you walk around spilling those words to everyone." She said in a satirical tone, rolling her eyes. She was highly concentrated as she listened to you and braided your hair. She acted like you didn't say the word but she was screaming on the inside. How was he capable of doing so?

"I will end it."

"Let's not make decisions when I'm braiding your hair because I might have braided too tightly, I cut the blood circulation to your brain. You might not be thinking straight." The room went silent and then Ae Ra blurted out, "why not just tell him about everything briefly and just see how he'll react. If he leaves then maybe it's worth no shit and you'd leave him knowing who he is. If he stays, then fuck, marry that man."

"I could just kill you, now, Ae Ra. Tell who what? Are you still jet lagged?" You ignored her suggestion and didn't even give it a second thought.

"Hey, just speaking my mind!" She said finally tying your braids. "Damn You look too good." She said as you turned around. She laid down on bed. "Let's cuddle and sleep for a bit and we'll see about your love." She said sleepily. You went into her embrace.

"He's not my love. That was a mistake. This relationship was not getting anywhere, anyways."

She shushed you, "just sleep." She said ignoring your words. She knew how much you'll be incapable of leaving him. She also knew how you won't be able to stay after all this, as well. She was stuck in this dilemma as deeply as you were. She understood your traumatic past and she didn't know how to help you decide. So, she chose to just be there for you and let the professionals do their work.