love is underrated.

Chapter Fifty-Eight.

My head pounded as I began to stir from my slumber. my eyes were glued shut as me whole body felt heavy and deflated. my eyelids were squeezed shut as the smell of antiseptic and cleanliness seemed to fill my nostrils. Thoughts slowly stumbled from the back of my mind to be the only thing I could think about. What I did. Am I dead? I questioned myself and questioned why I made this mistake. I tried opening my eyes but I grew more and ore scared of what I would see and where I was. I bright light was shining above me and faint voices could be heard as if they were the other side of a thin wall. My eyes fluttered oven and my chest heaved when I saw a hospital room. I lifted my head up to look down and around the room. A bandage cover both of my arms and the seat beside me as occupied. "Jaden." I sobbed as I saw his handsome face. "Daisy oh my gad." Tears trembled down his cheeks and the look of relief on his face enlightened me on how much of a mistake this was. Why did I do this to him? "I'm just going to get the nurse, stay right here." He said as he removed his fingers that were intertwined with mine. "Not going anywhere." I said and I tugged on the tube that was threaded into my skin, I winced at the slight pull and he only giggled. "Still the old you?" He smirked and I smiled back. 

I don't know what I was thinking. It was a moment of huge weakness but the relief I felt to see these walls was the best feeling in the world. I looked down at me hands to see the damage and a Dimond ring was sitting perfectly on my wedding finger. Jaden always was so sweet and that's why I love him. I looked in the corner at the 'get well soon' balloons and this must have been the gift he got to go with them. "She's up?" I heard a frantic voice muffled from inside the walls. "She can have visitors two at a time, this may be all confusing for her. Let me do some check up then I'm sure daisy will be happy to see you all." I soft female voice spoke and she walked into the door pushing it open with her back as she pulled a trolly of equipment behind her. "Daisy, welcome back." She chirped. she seemed like such a happy soul and I smiled warmly greeting her. "I just need to change these, is that okay?" she asked sweetly. "Will it hurt?" I said looking down knowing what I had done. "It shouldn't these have been on fo a few days and you're healing nicely." She answered as she slowly unwrapped them and I looked away. 

After she changed the bandages she looked over my chart and then sat in the chair where Jaden was sat previously. "I just need to ask you a few things, I know this must be hard but I need to asses you mental state and how conscious you are this kind of... injury can cause minor trauma to the brain." she said stuttering at the sensitive subject. I nodded still confused and tired. "So do you remember the events leading to the incident." She pressed and I nodded in agreement. I knew what I did and why I did it. "Can you tell me why you did it. Take you time." She said as she pushed a cup of water across the table. I picked it up taking a sip to loosen my dry lips. "I was angry at myself for causing everyone around me so much pain. I wanted to feel the pain." I said my voice getting quieter as I spoke. "Okay, and can you tell me how that made you feel." She asked again getting more commutable talking to me. "After I you know..." I said peering down at my arms. "I remember the blood and then I regretted it think what I had done, I knew I did it to much. I didn't know what I was doing this was my first time ever doing something like this and I tried to go get help but I just remember not being able to move. Everything just went so stiff and silent its like my body didn't know what movement was." I stammered with each word as I explained those last few moments. "You doing great sweetie, so just to clarify this wasn't intended to end in suicide?" I shook my head immediately. "Oh god no." I gasped. 

"Okay now I just need to asses you memory. Its just a few simple questions." I nodded and propped my self up in the bed more to face her properly. "Before the incident, what is the last thing you remember?" She asked I had to think about it my brain seemed so twisted. "I was cleaning my boyfriends room and I had an argument with my ex, we don't get along and I guess it had a toll on me." I half smiled confused and unsure but that was the latest memory fresh on my mind. "Okay and do you know where you are?" She pressed. "LA." She hummed in agreement. "And you birth month." She scribbled her pen on the pages in her hand. "October." I said without even thinking. "Looking at the chart, it seems you have a little bid of memory loss," My heart patters in my chest quicker that a deer in headlights. "It's nothing to worry about it is just some trauma but it should pass over, its caused by the trauma to the body. You are free to leave once I have filed these papers your not seen as a risk to yourself as you understand what you did ant this was just and act of a moment of weakness. You're lucky for you friend Griffin if it had been moments longer I'm afraid we would have lost you." She smiles. "You will have to come in every week to get these changed or you could do them at home with the help of one of your friends out there?" She asks. "At home please." I said quietly and she nodded. "I will be back in an hour or two with the things you need and I can send you on your way." She smiled standing from the chair and she left the room. 

I heard her through the walls telling Jaden and my friends what she told me. "Memory loss, you've got to be kidding me right?" I voice spoke which was so unrecognisable to me yet so familiar like I had hear it a thousand times. "She fragile and will need care at home in a safe environment I'm sure all of you lovely boys can figure that out. Your all great friends to her well done for all you've done." She praises them. "Boyfriend." The voice says again, surly that's not Jaden. His voice dont sound like that at all. the  walls must be messing up with the sounds up my brain is too mushed to tell the difference. "Two at a time please, be gentle. And she will be ready to go home soon." She said walking off. "The rest of you can go home, we will bring her right Jaden?" the voice says again setting of happiness bells in my mind but I was so confused why. "Lets give them space. She fine we can help out at home." I hear Griffin say and the shuffling as feet as the walk away .The door opens slowly and Jaden walks in with another boy. 

His hair is a wavy light brown on the top of his head and his eyes were bright and surrounded by redness. He looked so sleep deprived and his face lit up as his eyes met mine. I recognised his face but I couldn't place who he was. I'd say a slight acquaintance and nothing more I just didn't know who he was.