A Reference Filled Light Novel Tilted: Nintendelion.

Part 17 I got clean

Day 17

We walked the abandoned ruins of Wilmington, a large group of people including a suit of armor and a chicken would be intimidating to some, but not all. A small street gang appeared from an alleyway. The leader walked up to me and said "Hola Niño" with a weird smile, revealing his need for dental work. He whipped out a pocket knife that my little sister would carry. Luckily for me, I had the Gnife, and without reaction to his weapon, I unholstered the abomination of a weapon and pointed. He looked at it, did a full 180 and started running and screaming. I discharged a bullet at his foot. It missed (Because Gun Violence is probably not ok) but he jumped and fell over. We continued walking until we reached the ship, ignoring the swamp monsters that lurked. As we boarded through the information building we noticed it was vandalized and all electronics were looted. When we arrived on deck we noticed an effort to get the guns working and they seemed functional. Then we heard it. The pitter patter of feet on wood. When it came into view we saw him. Small, pale, robust. It was motherlicking Danny Devito. He came scurrying towards us and Soulja immediately got in front of the group. He unsheathed the buster sword and got into position. "You absolute FOOLS! DO YOU REALLY THINK YOU CAN STOP ME WITH JUST A PUNY SWORD! I HAVE ALREADY REJECTED MY HUMANIT-" He was cut short by me shooting him in the shoulder. With my extensive knowledge on vampire stuff, I knew that they are actually pretty weak. We bound him and took him below deck, where we found an exercise bike. We found the room used for electricity and with some time, we hooked up the bike to the main supply and forced Devito to pedal for the rest of his eternal life. I played Castlevania, and I don't take kindly to the undead. We noticed that the relatively old ship was modified in the places that needed it. Now there were working screens in the bridge, where I was going to sail this bad boy. It seems that vampire Devito scared off some group with the same idea as us. After settling in and choosing our positions on the ship, we were ready to set sail. We used the intercom system to tell our undead generator to pedal till his little legs fell off, regenerated, and fell off again. We started the engine, played appropriate music, the "Pirates of the Caribbean" theme obviously, and launched our vessel into the bay. As a show of authority, we shelled a bridge just because. And we started our grand pirate adventure; Destination, Panama Canal.