We all have our masks [Twenty One Pilots]

Chapter Twenty: Screen

Lena's eyes were burning. She took a glance at the clock on the bottom of the screen and sighed. It was almost 7am. She hadn't slept much and many different emotions and thoughts - especially after this call she had just ended - were messing with her head. The first one was Leah. Leah and Tyler. Her heart had dropped when Josh had mentioned that she was actually his girlfriend, but they didn't have the time to discuss it much longer, since Tyler had finally come back from his walk. Leah had been torturing Lena's mind every since.

She couldn't shake the thought of that girl away. That girl Tyler used to love. That girl Tyler still probably loved, now. It had been only a year, after all. And Lena didn't think that feelings could be erased by death. Her brain made her imagine herself in Tyler's shoes. What would she feel if her boyfriend had died? She couldn't even begin to fathom the immensity of the pain of losing someone you're in love with. Lena had certainly lost Jey, but a breakup couldn't compare to death. Desperately, she shook her head and moved her laptop away from her and onto the motel bed. 

She looked to her right. She could have sworn that Tyler had moved, but he was still sound asleep. To her left, on the other bed, Mark and Josh were also sleeping like babies. Hopefully no one was snoring this time. Carefully, Lena made her way to her suitcase and then off to the bathroom after picking up some clothes. Maybe a shower would do her good. 

And indeed, during the first few minutes, the hot water made her feel nothing but peace. She stood there in silence, enjoying each drop rolling over her body, surrounded by the sound of a thousand waves crashing on the bathroom tiles. But brains can't shut up, even when they sleep, and a wave of sadness and anxiety washed over Lena again.

Today was the last day of tour. The boys had a last show to play tonight, and then they were off to Ohio. Lena had spent the last few weeks trying to focus on her work, just to avoid thinking of that last day, but last days can't be put off forever and now she wished she had taken some time to get accustomed to the idea that everything had an end. 

Questions started pouring in her mind like water over her head. What was she going to do, after that? Where was she going to live? She would definitely need another job, but would she find one? And more importantly, would she be alone again? Would the guys go back to their lives like they used to be when she hadn't popped up yet? Would they forget about her? She wouldn't forget about them again. But if they did, should she go back to France, now that the family she had left behind couldn't clearly be of any help? She didn't want to be alone, here or there. She couldn't breathe. 

Quickly, Lena shut off the water and draped herself in a towel. Condensation had blinded the mirrors and steam was stuffing up the air. Suffocating, Lena opened the window and let the cold morning air envelop her naked body. She was shivering, but she didn't mind. Air was all she needed. 

Suddenly, her ears caught the sound of laughs behind the door, and she realized she was still there. And the boys were, too. Trying to think straight, she persuaded herself that she could figure out what was next for her with their help. Because they would help. She sighed, her hands still trembling from that anxiety. 

Slowly, she shuffled to the door and stuck her ear against it. The boys were laughing again, but something seemed off. It felt like there were more people in the room than needed be. Furrowing her eyebrows, Lena concentrated on the muffled sounds and it took her a few minutes to understand. There was a feminine voice. A familiar, feminine voice. 

Intrigued, Lena decided to carefully and slightly open the door. 

"Nice to meet you, Julie. I'm Josh and that's Tyler." Josh's voice said. Lena gasped, surprise opening her mouth in a clear "O" form. Julie? HER Julie? Lena was about to flip and go rage at the boys for answering a Skype called that wasn't destined to them on her laptop when she heard a strong french accent.

"Nice to meet you guys. Are you taking good care of my girl there? Where is she, by the way?"

Lena smiled. Nope, she couldn't barge in on their nice little conversation. She was curious of what would be said, and she decided to lurk on them for a little bit more. Plus, she was still wrapped in a towel and that wouldn't be a great idea to come in like that.

"She's in the shower..." Josh's voice continued, only to be interrupted by Tyler's. 

"Yeah, we locked her up there so she wouldn't make too much noise and wake up the people next door..." He spoke with a soft voice, and Lena was pretty sure his face didn't show a hint of joke, probably freaking Julie out. She refrained from laughing to loud and heard Josh reassuring the poor girl through the screen. 

They talked a bit more while Lena was getting dressed and they all seemed to get along well. It was so nice hearing her old friend talk to her new friends that when she was finally done, Lena sat on the toilet, just waiting for the right time to come in, not wanting to interrupt their moment. 

"In all seriousness guys, can I ask you a question?" Julie's voice said.

"Sure!" The male voice was a mix of Tyler's and Josh's, and Lena guessed they had simply answered at the same time like the BFF's they were. Lena smiled at the thought.

"About Lena... Is she... Uhm, you know... Is she clean? I know you don't seem like the kind of drugged rock stars she used to hang out with but..."

He heart racing, Lena shot up straight and showed up into the room, her face a little red. She hoped they hadn't heard. She begged to God that they hadn't heard. They couldn't know. 

"Hey guys, what are you doing there?" she asked, faking surprise. Her voice was weak and trembling, and she clenched her fists to not let any tear drop out of her eyes. They couldn't know. 

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Hey guys,

I'm sorry this is such a short chapter. I've been having a hard time figuring out what I would do next with this story. Seems like my inspiration left me. I might have found something that would lead me to the end of this story - but don't worry, I still have a few chapters in store before the end. Ultimately, this could also have a sequel.

But I would really like to begin another story that I have in mind, focusing on teenage Josh - fantasy style. But I don't know if I can begin that one before finishing here. What do you guys think? Would you like me to alternate? One chapter here, one chapter there?

Also, I published another book called "Christmas Tales" and it contains two short stories - one starring Tyler, and the other one Josh. I would really appreciate if you could read them and leave some feedback. Thank you.

And one last thing: I've been reading more and more negative comments on fanfictions recently, in general but also amongst the Clique, and this saddens me very much. I don't understand why fanfiction is so frowned upon. To me, it is a creative outlet as good as any other, and I have read plenty of amazing stories so far. The Clique is about love and understanding, yet people are still so quick to judge something they don't understand. But I'll keep writing, and you should too. Sorry my rant was almost as long as this chapter. I promise you great things for the next chapters to come!