Peaches | Gloxinia

15| Thoughts

Mira POV

Who am I really? What exactly do I want with my life?

These two questions kept circulating in my mind.

I sat alone in the cave where me and Gloxinia had first kissed. I felt like I was zombie. I felt so dead inside. I didn't know what to do with my life anymore because I hadn't thought this far.

This whole time I had been running after a single goal, my whole life up until now had been about striving to be the ruler of fairies.

Now that it had been stripped from me I felt so empty.

I gave a frustrated sigh.

Why had this happened to me?

'Mira?'

I sat up quickly. Was I hallucinating?

'Mira why are you avoiding me?'

I immediately covered my ears,"Leave me alone!" I screamed.

I got up and ran out of the cave just to see no one was there. Of course no one was here, it was the middle of the night.

I looked up at the moon in silence. I was going insane.

I took a deep breath in and then out.

I began to walk in the dark away from the cave and into the nearby apple orchard. I retraced the steps I had taken with Gloxinia.

Who was I back then?

I couldn't even remember.

What I did know was that back then I was happy and now I wasn't. Of course I wasn't happy ; I hadn't been home in two weeks, I didn't remember the last time I had eaten something, and my heart was growing cold.

I found myself laughing a bit before feeling the sadness sink in. I truly hated myself.

Suddenly a memory came to my mind.

Peaches.

I smiled a bit.

I remembered when about a year ago I and Gloxinia had sat on that cliff and were eating peaches.

'You know this is the best time to get them' he had said.

I felt as if a switch had been turned on because I felt like crying.

I covered my face with my hands as I tried to calm myself down.

I missed Gloxinia.

I missed him so badly and yet, I couldn't bring myself to see him.

Memories seemed to fill my mind and for once, I decided to embrace them.

I began to run through the apple orchard and I decided to fly into the sky. I soared through the air as I felt the wind blow against my body. I knew exactly where I was going.

For the first time in two weeks I felt my heart warm up just a bit.

I was still sad but at least I had thought of somewhere to go.

I looked down at the forest in awe as I flew way above. I went up and down before spotting the cliff and landing. I walked a little away from it and saw what I was looking for.

Peach trees.

I approached them and as I stared at them a sense of nostalgia washed over me.

I picked one and stared at it in silence.

I missed him.

The last time I had come here I was with Gloxinia.

This time, however, I was all alone.

I turned around and looked over the cliff at the forest.  I took in the view before sitting down and enjoying the moment.

I could hear crickets chirping and I looked up at the sky.

In truth, I wanted to leave this forest, I wanted to see what the outside world was like and most importantly, I wanted to find myself.

I scoffed. I really didn't feel like thinking right now.

I looked down at the peach in my hand before taking a bite.

I smiled, it hadn't changed at all.

But one thing was for sure,

I had.