Beyond the Reasons || JUSTIN FOLEY

Thirty-One

TESTING CLINIC
IMOGEN'S POV

I came down to the clinic with Diego to get tested for HIV. Since I had been sleeping with Justin before I started sleeping with Diego and after I stopped sleeping with Diego, we both had to get tested. The results came back pretty quickly and mine came back negative, which I figured they would be because even though I am on birth control, which I might stop taking since I definitely won't be having sex for a while, Justin was always very big on protection and he always used condoms.

"Hey. You waited for me." Diego said when he walked out of the testing room. I thought that was the fair thing to do.

"Of course I waited for you," I said while shrugging my shoulders as he sat down in the chair that was next to me. Well, there was a small table between our chairs so we had some distance.

"Um... negative," Diego said and I nodded my head.

"Good. And uh, me too." I said while holding up my pamphlets.

"Um, thanks for telling me, and coming with me," Diego said as he looked at me. I know I was a bitch to him in the end, but since there was a possibility of me having HIV, I couldn't just withhold that information from Diego. That would've been so rude.

"Of course... Although, I wasn't worried. He'd never do it without protection. He was pretty adamant on that." I said which was true. If Justin and I were ever in a moment where we were about to have sex and he didn't have a condom. We wouldn't have sex. Even though I was on birth control, he didn't care. Now, I'm glad he always had that precaution, or I could've been sitting here with HIV myself.

"They, uh... Did they tell you about PrEP? That seems like a good thing." Diego said.

"Yeah... though, I don't plan on having sex again, ever, so..." I said while shrugging my shoulders and I meant that. I don't know how long it's going to take, but it's going to take me a while before I'm able to be in a place where I'm ready to date again.

I had envisioned my whole future with Justin. I already knew he wanted to marry me, one day, and I knew I wanted to marry him too. I thought about our future together all the time, and now that it was cut short... it's going to take me a while to get over that and shape a future that doesn't have Justin in it.

I never thought it would come to this.

"Look, I'm sorry... about Justin... I... I know how much you loved him." Diego said.

"Love... how much I love him... but how would you know that?" I asked.

"I... I saw you dance together. And... a guy can tell... when a girl's heart is spoken for. I'm sorry... for everything I put you through. I'm done with it. I just... I couldn't let it go. I... I miss Monty so much... but it can't be anything like how you miss Justin... or even how you miss Monty yourself." Diego said and I didn't know what to do with that because he's right.

I'm even still grieving Jeff and it's been over a year.

"I don't know. Missing is missing. We may have known Monty in different ways and for different periods of time, but I wouldn't say that I miss him more than you do... it wouldn't be fair to your grieving." I said. Diego nodded his head while looking down at his feet, but I was looking at him.

"I... I know it's very much too soon to be saying anything like this, but... if you ever need someone to miss people with, I would like to maybe ask you out sometime. To go out with me... Again... but in a new way, sometime. Maybe I can... Can I start asking in about a month?" Diego asked. I honestly don't get what he thinks he's about to gain from this? Is he serious? We just buried Justin literally yesterday and he's already talking about asking me out? How insensitive can he be?