pAroDy sToRiEs fiLled wIth nOnsEnse

Chad Diary Part 6

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Professor Kirby just broke into the Durzly's house and pretty much scolded them for treating me badly. The look on their faces was just so satisfying. She also took me to this old Professor's house. Her name was Sweet, and I think she is going to teach Defense Against The Dark Arts.

I just arrived at the burrow and well... Tea was getting engaged to one of the Weezlys, and Mayhem was home.  Probably because of the news about Allen being back spreading like WILDFIRE. It was incredible. I also had rumors about being the "Chosen One" which well.. Probably is true.

P. S. Neko and Yama own a joke shop. It's just wonderful.

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Okay soo....A few weeks ago I got my O.W.LS... And I surprisingly got decent grades! We went to Diagon Alley and well, we encountered Yui acting all suspicious with her mother: Sun Falmoy. Yui seemed to look miserable and done with everything, now that her father is in jail. What was even more suspicious, what that when the seamstress tried to reach for her arm, she pulled away, and told her mother to go buy robes elsewhere. Really suspicious.

Neko and Yama's joke shop was terribly AMAZING! So many amazing stuff to buy. They literally have a banner that says "Why Are You Worried About You-Know-Who? You Should Be Worrying About U-No-Poo -- The Constipation Sensation That's Gripping The Nation!" (this is literally in the books don't at me).

I found out that Susan was dating this purple haired guy that looks like he came out of a video game. I felt genuinely odd, like I wanted to punch the wall in frustration. I have no idea why, but I felt that way.

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Ah yes, Hogwarts Train time. I'm sitting with Hashim and Ramune, and now Hashim and I were called by Professor Sweet into their compartment. She likes to gather "people who seem popular" apparently.

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I was late to the Sorting Ceremony again. I wanted to spy on Yui and her new gang, which consisted of Apple, a Slytherin girl, Vivi and Alex, but she caught me, and she stomped on my nose. Luckily Hinata found me, since Ramune told her I was nowhere to be seen. My nose was broken and I had no time to change into robes, but Hinata fixed my broken nose as well. 

What started this year worse, was that Professor Acceled is now teaching Defense Against the Dark Arts! She's going to turn it into a subject about the Dark Arts! But that would also mean that Potions would be a more decent subject- And I can take Potions as a NEWT now. Woohoo to murdering Dark Wizards and shippers!

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First day with Professor Acceled teaching DADA. It wasn't as bad as Mexovic's lessons, since we actually get to learn something from this. But still. It made me not really lime DADA as much as I did before. But I got detention, and that's sad. I also forgot to write about how I'm gonna get private lessons with Professor Kirby on the same time I'm getting detention, so I guess detention can pass.

Potions was great. My book had amazing tips on how to make luck potion, so I'm keeping it! This Half-Blood "Prince" is amazing, and I salute to him or her or whatever. 

I'm also the captain of the Quidditch team so yay I guess.

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I had my lessons with Professor Kirby today and... It was really interesting. We uncovered the memories of this Ministry dude and we saw this certain pure-blooded family, the descendants of Salazar Slytherin, for they can speak Parseltongue and that's what Kirby told me. They were killed by the Ministry dude, except the female. 

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Homework here, homework there, HOMEWORK AND NON-VERBAL SPELLS EVERYWHERE! So many people are going back home from Hogwarts because of all this. Being Quidditch captain was actually really difficult, and holding tryouts was just stressful. Susan got into the team officially, and Logan did good as well.