pAroDy sToRiEs fiLled wIth nOnsEnse

The Me Inside Of Me Is Blue

Vivi woke up at Yui's house this morning, cause she had a sleepover there. 

"Morning Yui."

"Morning Vivi."

"So, I had a vision that I had to go to Sweet's house and apologize-" stated Vivi.

"Okay..." Yui was cOnCernEd.

The two walked out to meet Neko, Yui's aunt. She seemed like a complete and utter psycho. No wonder Yui had amazing fighting skill. They also met her dad and he was also a huge psycho. They walked to Sweet's house, which was also near this neighborhood. They finally arrived to what looked like a VERY expensive house.

"This is it. Sweet's house."

Vivi knocked on the door. After a few minutes, Sweet opened it.

"Hey Vivi. What brings you here? Come in."

They walked inside.

"Look, I just want to apologize-"

"Make me some Prairie Oyster! Chop chop!" Sweet ordered and walked to her room.

"Yui what the hell is a Prairie Oyster?" Vivi asked cluelessly.

"Raw eggs, vinegar, hot sauce, Worcestershire, salt and pepper."

"How do you know that-"

"Auntie Neko, let's go make one!"

They attempted making Prairie Oyster and somewhat did succeed, now Yui decided to joke around by putting drain cleaner in a mug.

"Let's give this to her!" Yui cackled.

"What, no that will kill her!"

"I was kidding!" Yui exclaimed. Vivi grabbed the closest mug behind her, not looking at the contents.

"Uhhh Vivi?"

"What?"

"Nothing!"

They walked to Sweet's room and gave her the drink. 

"This better not fail." She drank it and choked to death.

"CORN NUTS!" She died.

"OH MY GOD I KILLED HER!" Vivi whisper-yelled. She was panicking so badly.

"Let's write a suicide note all right? No one will know." Yui suggested. Vivi took out a pen and paper then wrote:

"Dear world...
Believe it or not, I knew about fear;
I knew the way loneliness stung.
I hid behind smiles and crazy hot clothes;
I learned to kiss boys with my tongue."

"But oh, the world, it held me down;
It weighed like a concrete prom queen crown."

"They couldn't see past my rockstar mystique,
They wouldn't dare look in my eyes.
But just underneath was a terrified girl
Who clings to her pillow and cries!
My looks were just like prison bars;
They've left me a myriad of scars."

It was funny they used myriad, she got that wrong on her spelling quiz last week!

"No one thinks a pretty girl has substance. That's the curse of popularity.I am more than just a source of handjobs.No one sees the me inside of me."

"Box up my clothing for Goodwill;
And give the poor my Nordic Track.
Donate my car to crippled kids,
Or to those ghetto moms on crack.
Give them my hats and my CDs,
My pumps and my flats, my three TVs!"

"No one thinks a pretty girl has feelings;
But I weep for all I failed to be.
Maybe I can help the world by leaving;
Maybe that the me inside of me."

"Oh my god that is perfect!" laughed out Yui. The two sneaked outside to escape the house. 

---

The news of Sweet's "suicide" spread as quickly as lighting. The school mourned her death, and Sweet's ghost? Oh she was so delighted! She was bigger than John Lennon! She was on the news, the radio, heck even on Vietnam TV- All by Susan.

Vivi was sick and tired of seeing it on TV, she felt so guilty! Now she just received a message from Sunny. She had to go to the cemetery. Huh. 

---

Vivi was now at the cemetery. She saw Susan and Sunny hiding in the car.. And Logan and Chad being drunk as hell.

"AyYAYAyayay ViVIVIII-" yelled Chad.

"SUNNY WHAT THE HELL-"

"VIIiiVIviI I WAIItEdD TeN bEeErs fOR YOUuUU." Logan exclaimed

"I DIDNT WANNA GET ASSAULTED" yelled Sunny.

"WELL SO DO I."

"yOYuUuu MaKE mY-" I will cut that out but Chad and Logan said that at the same time.

"PEDO PEDOS PEDOS AAAAA!!" Vivi yelled pathetically.

Now those two started going at each other and Vivi took this opportunity to run as quick as sAnIC. Do I have to point out how disgusted Sunny and Susan were?

--

Welp. Best. Chapter. Ever.