Hope Stark [2]

Chapter 50: I'm so Lonely

I was in a glass cell while strapped to a big metal chair. I still had the shock collar, which is itchy as all hell.

"If you shock me one more time—!" I clenched my hands into fists as they did it again.

"Shut up..." the guard grumbled to me. He's a total dick, complete asshole, douchefuckmcgee, bum-knuckle.

The door opened, making the guards sight in relief. They used a forklift to pick up my little holding cell. I glared at the guards who stood beside me.

"My pain tolerance is a lot higher than you think..." I pointed to him, completely out of breath. I felt myself getting sweaty. I noticed Steve and Sam. "Do you guys have an air conditioner in here?! I'm feeling a little hot?! Is this chair heat resistance?!" I yelled to them.

They stared at me. I could see the anger in their faces. They can't really do a thing about it, so I can't say anything. I smirked at the guard who was glaring at me.

"You can't shock me now..." I taunted him with a sly smirk. He sneered and pressed the bottom, not caring about the people around him looking.

My body tensed as my body filled with pain. The remote was taken from the stupid guard.

"Holy shit biscuits!" I exclaimed in after the pain went away as they rolled me away from the others. I laid limp against the chair. "I guess it would be a good idea to shut up."

~

I groaned as I sat in the room alone. I looked around the room, but there was only one table and chair surrounded by white walls. I couldn't hear anything except my own breathing and thoughts.

I stared at the wall in front of me.

All I want to do is sleep, but I know I shouldn't. They'll probably bring someone to talk to me, but I can't think of who that will be.

I glanced at the small camera in my small holding container thing. I stared at it. I know they are watching me. I bet they're watching Bucky too.

"I don't need to be in here, you guys know this." I stared at the camera. I sighed and rested my head back. I was still sweating. I was getting hotter. The sweat rubbing against the collar is making it very itchy.

"This thing is highly unnecessary." I tried to point to the shock collar. "This was a low blow. Y'all lucky I got over the electric shock fear a while ago. Oh! Is Natasha alright? She was in Vienna too. Is she okay?"

I stared at the camera as if it would answer me.

"Oh right, it's just a camera." I rolled my eyes. I tried to move the collar to make it more comfortable. I glanced at the camera for a moment.

I played with the collar. You couldn't see the blue mist because of the illusion I put up. I tried to take it off, but it turned on.

I gasped as my body tensed up again. I closed my eyes as I waited for the pain to end. It did.

"God!" I exclaimed with a breathless chuckle. I sighed in defeat and relaxed in my chair. I pulled on the metal wrist and ankles straps.

I watched the door to my room open. I smiled, but it slowly disappeared when I realized who it was.

Dad walked into the room slowly. I stared at him, remembering him walking out on me. I told him code yellow and he still walked out. He knows that's important. That's when we need each other, that's when we stay with each other.

I watched Dad walk up to me. The thick layer of glass separating us.

He's hurting. I can see it. With Pepper, Steve, the Accords. It's tearing us apart, all of us. He can see it too. He's trying. He's trying to do what he think is right.

"I'm sorry for walking out on you." He started. I stared into his eyes with an emotionless face. He didn't break eye contact though. He got closer to the glass, crossing the line on the floor.

"It was a code yellow and I know how important those are. But I'm trying to do what's right..." Dad looked at the glass box I'm in. "God I hate seeing you like this. I tried to tell them not to do this to you."

"Is Natasha alright?" I asked him, not caring about anything else right now.

"Yeah, she okay. She's out there." Dad pointed towards the door. I sighed in relief and nodded. 

"I thought maybe the Accords would also help fix things with Pepper. I dont want to lose her... but I'm slowly losing you. I can feel it. We don't talk anymore. The last time we actually hung out was 3 years ago before you left to join S.H.I.E.L.D." I frowned at the fact. "I thought this would be the best thing for us, for everyone."

"I can't sign it." I shook my head. Dad let out a shaky breath.

"Why?" He asked, pulling the chair to sit right infringe of me. I watched him for a moment.

"I don't know if this is being selfish because I know I probably won't see you that much, but you know I can't just stand by and let something bad happen, not when I can do anything about it. Ever since I could remember, I wanted to use my powers for good. I wanted to use them under my control and for good things, considering where they came from. If I sign, I don't have full control over my powers. I can't have the freedom to use my magic for many other great things. I'll be told what to do, and where to go. People are scared of what I can do and sometimes I am too, but that doesn't mean I should be locked away.

What I did with HYDRA, I had no control over whatsoever. They took my memories making me forget who I was. They took my freedom to choose. I was used. I killed a lot of people yes, but I was 9 fucking years old and I was scared of what they would do to me if I said no. All I could remember was the pain." I put down my illusion. I changed my clothes and you could see the scars that covered my arms. I stared at the man I'm glad to call my father.

"You know me better then most of the people here. You've seen these, I've told you what it was like.

I will not be put in a cell and used whenever someone needs me. I'm done being told what to do. I just want to be free and help. Why can't any of y'all see that? I'm not HYDRA, Bucky isn't HYDRA, not anymore. The Winter Solider is a complete different person, just as the 9 year old witch from those HYDRA files."

Dad cleared his throat.

"Dad, I love you. I always will. You made me the person I am today. You gave me someone else to look up to. I know this isn't what you want, and I'm probably disappointing you right now, but this is my decision. This is what my gut is telling me to do. It might not be the most logical thing to do, but I think it's the most humane."

I chuckled when I noticed him trying not to cry. He shuffled in his seat and stood up.

"I'm so sorry, Hope. I'll try to get you out of here, I promise." Dad put his hand on the glass. I sent him a small smile, putting my illusion back up, putting on my suit and covering my scars. "I'll convince them to take off the collar..."

I watched dad leave. I really hope mom and dad make up. I don't want them fighting anymore. They are honestly the best couple.

I sighed out as I was alone again.

"I'm so lonely... I have nobody..." I sang softly with a little snicker at the end.