Hopelessly Broken

87. Sleep Well

6.09.20

Jack's POV (1 week later) There is a slight trigger warning in this chapter, I'll tell you when.

A week later, my body was finally healed enough for me to go home. It's annoying to heal slowly, but at least I finally have the capability to get out of this hell hole. My dad will have to carry me out, but I don't care. I just don't want to be here anymore. "You have everything, right?" Dev prompted while walking around my room looking for misplaced items. I already had my two babies in my arms, but Devon always has to check around the room one last time.

"Dev, we've got it," Dad commented from across the room, and the boy finally stopped his movements.

"Sorry, I just worry a lot."

"Oh, we know."

I handed little Jacob to Dev, and he took the baby boy with a lot of care. He hadn't come back to the hospital since I gave birth, so today was the first time he met my babies. He had been too busy taking care of Connor to come in, but I didn't really care. We both have our own little families now; he can't be looking after me 24/7. My dad carefully looped one arm under my back and another under my knees before slowly lifting my body off of the bed, and I had to bite my tongue to stifle a groan from passing my lips. I focused on my daughter so that I hardly felt the pain, and the little girl giggled at the sight of me. Once I was placed in the back seat of the car again, I felt my body relax against the leather. My dad had gotten a car identical to the old one after the crash, so I was pretty used to the seats by now.

Devon finally handed me back my child, and I held onto both of my twins. As soon as we arrived at the mansion, my mom came out and healed my stomach. We couldn't risk doing it in front of the doctors, but now my suffering could finally be over. I moved my exhausted feet towards the nursery, and my body was beginning to feel heavy with tiredness. You know what? I'm going to give Daniel one last chance to be how he should. Let's just hope that the chance works now that our children are actually born.

(Trigger Warning: Suicide)

I arrived at his door, and I stood behind the wood while knocking softly. I assumed that he was doing that ignore everyone thing again, so I said his name softly while knocking again. Suddenly, I smelt something that set my adrenaline aflame: blood. I slammed my foot against the door over and over again until it gave way, and I barged into the room that now looked like a murder scene. I ran towards his body, and he was laying there with a knife in his own hands. His now dull green eyes were staring distantly behind me, and his hair was stuck together with blood.

"Dan?" I whispered, and I lifted his back up to feel for a pulse. My clothes were already filthy with blood, but I didn't care as I pushed my fingers against his neck. "No! No you have to come back to me," I commanded while ignoring all of the warning signs. He isn't going to come back, and he isn't asleep. "Daniel!" My tears littered in with the thick red all around me, and my stare was blank. "Why would you leave? Why..." Sobs were wracking down my body, but I caught the sound of voices down the hallway.

"We need to tell him to get his act together. I want to know our grandbabies!" Alex communicated, and I knew that his heart would break as soon as he walks in.

"We can only guide him, and you know that." When they came around the corner into the bedroom, I heard two gasps and a thud from the doorway. My tears were still falling, and I looked up into icy blue eyes. "Pull yourself together, kid. Is he alive?"

"I can't feel a pulse!" I shouted while still clutching his body. The poor boy's father crouched down next to me, and he reached in as well to feel for any sign of life.

"My God."

"What is it?"

"Jack... He's gone to a bette-"

"Don't you say it like that! He isn't the turtle my parents flushed down the toilet when I was five!"

"Jack, come up out of the blood puddle and we can talk about this." The older man had to help me up from the ground, and I sat on the bed with tears dribbling down. He found a note for the boy's suicide, and I listened while the man's shaky voice read it for the world.

"To whom it may concern, I can't do this anymore. I'm alone, and no one will even talk to me. Jack can hardly look at me without wishing I was gone, and I guess now I am. My heart is too full for goodbyes, and now it's time for me to leave. Goodbye now, my fearless papa, loving father, and most of all... My soulmate, Jack. I'll see you in the afterlife... Goodbye cruel world." By the end of the note, I was choking on my spit. "Listen, kid, pull yourself together!" I tried to take a few deep breaths, but my body was too hiccupy to follow those simple instructions. "Jack, you need to calm down. He may be gone now, but you need to be here... For the kids. They can't lose both parents."

I leaned against him while my body shook, and he rubbed a hand up and down on my back. "We'll get through this, okay?"

*** (Those of you that skipped the triggering content and wish to read the end of the book, here ya go)

A few weeks later, we went to the funeral, and I couldn't stop sobbing. I promised myself that day would be the last day I cried for him, and it was. I focused myself into getting stronger, faster, and becoming a better dad for my little babies. They grow older every day, and it hurt my heart when Sasha's first word was Devon. I can't blame the poor boy; he's been there a lot for my kids. It's just that that honor should have gone to Dan... My dead soulmate. I received support from all sides, but I can never know what it could have been like if he was still here.

Today, my kids start kindergarten along with Connor, and I couldn't feel prouder of their little personalities. Sasha like to be a little Daredevil, but she could always count on Jacob to keep her safe. Connor was just a troublemaker, and I feel really bad for my brother. Overall... I guess I'm okay? Nothing can fill the hole in my heart, but that is to be expected. My life will continue without him no matter how much I didn't want it to. I look forward to the years to come surrounded by my huge family; they will be undoubtedly interesting, that much is for certain.

Dan, if you're listening, I still want you, but I know I can't have you. Sleep well, my love, and I'll see you soon.

And that's the end. Like for real this time. Sequel will exist, I'll let you know when it comes out. Goodbye for now!