Tears on you

The Physical Battle

Zak's point of view

It's been a few weeks since my mom threw Holly out of my house and hopefully out of my life and everything was going great.

Y/N is slowly starting to get back to her normal happy self, but the only issue we're facing now is knowing when Y/N will be able to walk again.

Despite her leg and arm being in a cast we have tried to do some little exercises to try and gain her strength back. But each time she stands or goes to take a little step her legs give way and she falls. Each time she tries to stand or even walk I'm always right next to her to catch her before she falls to the ground.

Each time Y/N tries and unfortunately fails she always breaks down.

Y/N: "why can't I stand or even walk? I want to be me again"

Zak: "I know you do baby I want you back too. We'll find out what's going on at your next appointment"

******

Sure enough the day arrived and today was Y/N's appointment at the hospital. As I was wheeling Y/N in her wheelchair down the corridor I couldn't help but feel pain. I felt like I failed as her boyfriend and failed as her friend. She deserves someone who can help her more than I can.

Finally we arrived to the waiting room we needed to be in and waited for the doctor to see Y/N.

Y/N's point of view

As me and Zak was waiting to see the doctor for my appointment I looked over at Zak and noticed he looked upset. I reached out and held his hand in mine, but as soon as Zak looked at me I noticed he had tears in his eyes.

Y/N: "Zak... What's wrong?"

Zak: "you deserve someone better than me"

Where the hell was this coming from, this isn't like Zak at all.

Y/N: "what?! No I don't... I don't want to be with anyone else Zak, I want to be with you"

Zak was just about to say something to me when the doctor called me into his office.

Doctor: "Y/N we're ready for you"

And just like that Zak was wheeling me into the doctors office.

Doctor: "right Y/N to start with how have you been?"

Y/N: "I'm OK thanks"

Doctor: "any more issues with your speech?"

Y/N: "No, I don't think so"

I looked at Zak before he gave me a little smile and then spoke to the doctor.

Zak: "no her speech is well and truly back"

Doctor: "I'm glad to hear that, right I'm gonna check your vitals before we take you round for a xray to see how everything is"

Y/N: "OK"

Sure enough I was having all of my vitals checked and then was taken for a xray to check everything. After a little wait the doctor gave me the good news that my casts on my leg and arm can finally come off.

Doctor: "well good news Y/N your leg and arm cast can finally come off as they have both healed lovely"

Then the storm hit with the bad news.

Zak: "what about her back?"

Doctor: "unfortunately that's showing no signs of improvement"

Y/N: "what does that mean?... Will I ever get to walk again?"

Then the doctor looked at me before he shook his head no. In that moment my world felt like it came crashing down on me.

Doctor: "it's hard to tell at the moment if you'll be mobile again, but all we can do is try... I'll sign you up for  physiotherapy treatment to see if anything can help you. But right now I can't say yes you will be mobile again or no you won't. Its literally just a long wait"

Hearing his words broke me even more, I leaned my head into my hands and cried. I don't even have to look at Zak but I can tell he feels broken too but through his pain he comforted me the best he can.

Doctor: "I'm so sorry Y/N"

The doctor placed his hand on my shoulder before we was soon finishing off in the hospital by getting my casts taken off. Once we was finished me and Zak returned to the car and was on our way back home.

I couldn't even look at Zak or even say anything, I hurt and feel broken. I just want to surrender to this darkness that's washing over me..... I'm no longer me.

Finally what felt like forever we finally arrived home and was heading inside. As Zak let go of the wheelchair to close the door behind him I started to wheel myself out of the room and made my way to Zak's spare bedroom to be by myself.

Zak: "Y/N!?"

I made my way into the room and closed the door behind me before I locked it and started to break down again. All the time I was breaking down Zak was trying to get me to open the door.

Zak: "Y/N baby please open the door"

Y/N: "no!"

Zak: "baby please, you shouldn't be on your own when you're like this"

Y/N: "like what? The shell of a woman that I used to be! Just leave me alone!"

Without realising Zak managed to unlock and open the door. As soon as he saw me and the state I'm in he came over to me and wrapped his arms around me tight.

Zak: "I'll never leave you alone baby, not now, not ever.. You understand"

I just shook my head no.

Y/N: "you don't deserve to have me around Zak. I'm not the girl I used to be. You deserve someone who's not broken or damaged like me. I want you to find someone else and forget about me"

Zak: "Y/N I don't want to be with anyone else. I want to be with you, it doesn't matter how you are I'll always love you and I'll always be here to support you"

Y/N: "you'll get tired of me"

Zak: "why are you saying that?"

Y/N: "because its the truth"

The look on Zak's face says it all, he's hurt by what I just said. Zak quickly left the room and I followed close behind him before I saw him head towards the front door.

Y/N: "where are you going?"

Zak: "Y/N... Please, I just need some space for a few minutes"

Y/N: "but you can't leave me like this"

Zak: "I won't be long"

Slowly and painfully I watched Zak walked through the door and left me on my own.