Our Parents Pain Came With Love

Chapter 72

ONE MONTH LATER
-MACELLA BROWN
I think the hardest thing about breaking up with someone is going back to your routine before them, before you and him were a couple, deleting pictures on your social media hurts because it makes everything real and you are forced to accept what is and don’t get me started on coming across their clothes in your closet that still smell of him. I honestly thought this thing would be easy you know? Like yeah sure we over and all, I mean it's been a whole month but honestly it really does still hurt like hell. I managed to delete our pictures and videos on my Instagram and even went as far as unfollowing him but he on the other hand hasn’t stopped following me, he still posts my pictures and captions them with sweet love messages, he sends me flowers every now and then apologising, he sends me sweets and chocolates that he knows I love. Honestly speaking Yanga isn't making it easy to get over him with the way he’s going on. I’m trying to forget him and today I’m going home, schools are closed and I’ll be seeing him for the first time since I ended things with him, I feel nervous AF, my stomach is churning, I feel like I’m about to puke and don’t get me started on my sweaty hands that I keep wiping on my sweater but to no success. In a nutshell I’m just not ready to meet him. I walk out dragging my bag and I spot Yaya’s car, I walk over to the car with hopes to see Yaya but I am taken aback when Yanga gets out of the driver’s seat. I halt to a stop, my throat feels dry, I suddenly can't speak at the sight of him and him looking this damn good does not help the situation at all!
“Hello Macella”
He says, his voice is enough to make my knees weak but I stand my ground having mixed emotions. I don’t know if I’m angry or happy to see him but I know I’m somewhere in between. You see one thing they don’t school you about when it comes to break ups is that the first time you see them after a break up is the hardest because you feel a lot of things and if they look as good as Yanga does right now you don’t know whether to hug them tightly or to take off your shoe and beat the shit out of them.
“What are you doing here?”
I ask with a straight face
“How are you?”
He asks unbothered by my question
“Yanga why are you here?”
I ask again, he walks over and I have half a mind to move back and no, not because I’m afraid I might hug him tightly but because I might actually take off my shoe and beat him with it to get off the anger I have
“May we get in the car?”
He says taking my suitcase, the thing about anger and thinking you over everything is that it hits you when you least expect it. I’m in the parking lot of an airport and there's people going up and down here but right now I don’t care about them, all I care about if hurting Yanga the same way he hurt me. Right now I just want to hit him until I no longer feel the urge to hit him. he’s about to pull my suitcase when I start hitting him with my handbag
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-YANGA BESS
I’m stunned when I feel Mercy hit me with her handbag on my back
“I hate you”
Are the words that follow next, I turn around and she starts hitting me with her bag screaming at me “I hate you”, balling her hands into fists as her bag falls to the floor and she continues hitting me with tears rolling down her cheeks. I know the damage I’ve done, I regret the shit I did to her and maybe fetching her was not as good of an idea as I thought it would be. Yaya warned me about it, dad warned me about it but I stole mom’s car key and drove here because I needed to talk to Mercy alone first before she got home and avoided me at all costs.
“I’m so sorry”
Is all I can say as she hits me on my chest crying mumbling a lot of hateful words towards me, I wrap my arms around her and just hold her tightly, people are now looking at us and some are taking videos
“I am so sorry”
I say holding back my own tears, I never wanted to hurt her like this. I never imagined I would hurt her the way I did, I love Macella and I know I didn’t show it but I want to make this right with her. I hold her tightly as she tries to fight me apologising countless times to her until she finally calms down after about 10 minutes or so. She pushes me off of her and then slaps the daylights out of me then picks up her bag as if this did not just happen, if my chest and cheek didn’t hurt the way they do right now then I’d honestly think I imagined everything. I pull her bag to the car and then put inside the trunk then close it and go to the drivers seat
“Macella I’m really sorry for cheating on you. Things were never supposed to get to that point, I have no reason for cheating on you and it's no use justifying it but please just know that I acknowledge that I fucked up really bad and I am willing to do whatever I have to in order to fix us”
She chuckles
“Fix us? What are we? A broken lamp? There's no fixing anything here Yanga. You cheated on me, you broke my trust in you. I could never trust you again, I could never forget what you did to me Yanga, I almost broke my ribs because of you and your cheating. There is no fixing us, there is no us”
She spits out, I take a deep breath and then exhale
“Mercy please”
She shakes her head no
“There were days where I used to lay awake at night going through her Instagram trying to figure out what it is that I was missing”
She chuckles
“I went through each and every one of her pictures, zoomed in and out trying to figure out what exactly she has that I didn’t. maybe I’m not as smart as she is, maybe I don’t dress as well as she does and then I remember that no man, this girl dresses like me, going through her Instagram page is like going through my own account, it doesn’t make any sense. I can't find any satisfying answers. You did that Yanga, you have me questioning myself, my worth, the kind of person I am, you have me feeling insecure in a way I never have before. I can't forgive you, a month is too little to forget the pain you have caused me. Just drive me home, I don’t want to hear whatever you think you have to say to me”
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To Be Continued