S U R R E N D E R

chapter forty

A car ride had never been so quiet before. Jisoo who was driving was scared of even speaking a word to Chaeyoung that seemed like she had lost something more than a friend from her everyday life. She wasn't blaming her, she couldn't blame her because she herself felt bad while seeing Jennie pass by the security guards and getting lost from their sight as she made her way in the plane. Jisoo didn't know her that well, she could confidently say that she knew Jennie the least out of all of them but still she felt like a piece of her was missing as well. She would be a big liar if she said that she hadn't gotten used to sit in Jennie's living room while all of them bitched about all kinds of things, watched F.R.I.E.N.D.S even if she didn't like it that much or the times that they ordered sushi and just looked at each other without saying anything.

"Are you okay?" Jisoo asked as she pulled the car over to the side of the road, turning the engine off and facing Chaeyoung who was looking away, Jisoo's hand reaching out to hold her friend's in hers. Chaeyoung shook her head and rested it against the window pane, her eyes closing to hold the tears that were ready to fall from her eyes, her breathing getting a bit more rapid than it was before. "I should have stopped her or at least join her," Chaeyoung spoke up and her broken voice filled the whole car, Jisoo's heart felt like breaking at the thought of not only losing Jennie from the picture but also Chaeyoung who she knew since they were both nineteen. "She's not going to be okay alone unnie, she's going to destroy herself again" Chaeyoung spoke up again and this time her eyes shoot open looking back at Jisoo who was ready to cry as well, this car ride had somehow turned even more emotional than she had anticipated.

"Chaeng, this is not in our hands," Jisoo tried comforting her but she actually felt like she was only making things worse, she didn't really think that there was something she could say that could make the situation lighter for Chaeyoung. "It's not in her hands either. The only person that can do something doesn't even know she's gone." Chaeyoung snapped and took out all her bitterness and frustration on Lisa who was even present, the reality of Jennie being gone starting to settle in as she spoke of it out loud. Another knife in Jisoo's heart. "She's fucking gone, she's not a few blocks away anymore, she's G.O.N.E, gone." Chaeyoung repeated herself and felt like punching something from how stressed and frustrated she actually was, getting mad at everything and everyone at that moment. "And there's nothing I can do, nothing at all" Chaeyoung sighed and closed her eyes as she tried calming herself down, the more she talked about the more pissed off she got.

"We could tell Lisa, but I doubt that will do anything," Jisoo suddenly said the first thought that came in her mind, Chaeyoung's head turning to face her for the first time since that car ride had started. "No, no Chaeng we can't," Jisoo spoke up and her hands grabbed the steering wheel once again. She knew what Chaeyoung had in mind the moment she opened her mouth and voiced that thought of hers and she wouldn't take any risks letting her friend talk to Lisa about Jennie leaving Korea. "We totally can. I know love when I see it and those two are in love unnie," Chaeyoung started being all excited, her eyes almost sparking but Jisoo couldn't tell if it was from the crying or the excitement that suddenly rushed in her body. "There's no way you don't see it, come on now" Chaeyoung spoke up again, hitting Jisoo's shoulder when she saw that her friend was avoiding to look at her now. Deep down she agreed, Jisoo could see it to and she had started to see it long before Jennie even started developing those feelings. Lisa was always way ahead of Jennie on that part.

"Plus we both ship them," Chaeyoung pointed out and hit Jisoo's shoulder again, the term that had become familiar to Jisoo now being mentioned once again, the older woman groaning as she was faced with a difficult decision. "Are you willing to let your best friend get married to a woman she doesn't love?" The woman spoke up again, daring Jisoo but also putting even more thoughts into the older's head, reasons as to why they should talk to Lisa about Jennie flying out Seoul. "No but as you said she's the one taking decisions, it's in her hand." Jisoo sighed and leaned forward until her head hit the steering wheel as well, her hands still holding onto it. Chaeyoung had a point, Lisa's feelings for Evelyn were never as strong as they were for Jennie and Jisoo got to experience the frustrated state that Lisa was once because of Jennie. But still, she didn't feel okay with the idea of making Lisa go through that before her wedding. "You know I'm right though, you know they love each other. Let's do something about that please," Chaeyoung pleaded this time and her whole body pretty much landed on Jisoo's, the older woman groaning once again due to the pressure she was feeling at the moment.