losing you. || markhyuck

5. d.h.

Well I didn't think certain about one thing: Where should I go to now?

I can't go back to my dorm, I can't go to johnny as he spends most of the time either with ten, the café or some wedding plans.

And again just one person is left.

Qian kun.

I'm standing in front of his door again, and feel sorry to be such a bother to everyone and especially him.

"Donghyuck? Wouldn't have thought to see you this soon again. Wanna come in?"

"Yes. Thanks sicheng." He hugs me and I go into kuns room.

"Hey kun. Yangyang."

"Man, nice to see you."

"What's up hyuck?"

"I have a problem." He just smiles at me, well aware I always come because of one.

Yangyang goes out of the room, even it's not necessary but it's nice of him to be this attentive.

"I have no place to stay at." It's barely hearable as it comes out of my mouth, not more than a whisper.

"I know what you want to ask. And yes. Of course you can."

I fucking love this guy.

He stands up and pulls me out of the room. "Let's make yourself a place to stay shall we?" He winks and I giggle a bit.

He proposes me to stay in his room, if yangyang is fine with it, because all the other rooms are already full with three people and I agree of course, as I'm also the most comfortable with him.

He also shoves some place free in his drawer, for my, not really existing, belongings.

The other members who just got told that I will move for some time to their place, start to show and explain things, like food plans and shopping lists to me and offer me things, as they notice I didn't take much clothing with me.

I'm really glad they're fine with it and welcome me warmly.

Exhausted I lie down at the mattress we put in one corner of the room and pass out eventually.

I must've been more wasted than I thought.

In the next morning I wake up around 10AM, definitely late for my sleep rhythm and spot a sticky note immediately.

It's from kun who told me he and the other members had to attend to their practice and won't be back until 6PM, also a list of foods and leftovers on different place I can eat.

It's really nice how caring and worried he is, just like a parent sometimes.

But unfortunately I can't stay in this cozy dorm for long, instead I have to meet the ceo of the entertainment to talk about my contracts.

I definitely have to cancel those, but I already told him the matter, so I hope this won't be a problem and will go fast.

I brush my teeth in the bathroom and am shocked as I look into the mirror.

My both mes exchange glances and damn I look bad.

The hair roots have been growing out and because I didn't go to the hairdresser, my hair is already in a length I could make a ponytail without problems.

My eyes look kind of empty and tired, supported by my dark circles and dry and crispy lips.

Gosh, it's really a miracle the people aren't running away from me.

I pull over a hoodie, the only thing I wear these days and try to fix myself at least a bit to not scare the ceo.

Then I hasten out of the building because I'm already late.

The meeting with the ceo went better than expected and now I just have to sign the papers and im officially out of the company.

Truthfully it's sad, because I worked so hard to even get into there, but well, I can't help it.

I take the bus to reach the dorm, because it's more far away than my old one and I'm already wasted as I walked before.

Obviously they're not back yet, so i decide to do vlive.

I have to tell the fans anyways so i guess this is a good opportunity for me.

I haven't done this in so long and also I'm not sure If I ever did one alone. But before I can start I have to fix myself again, because honestly I don't want the fans to see me like this, so I put on makeup, the first time for long, that's the only way for me to look at least a bit normal.

Then I can start this and many people participate, leaving comments like, 'how did we deserve to get this so sudden' and 'I can't wait for the comeback.'

Fuck.

I hate to break it to them, but I have no chance. "It's really hard for me to tell you this, but I might leave the group. It's because of private reasons I don't want to explain now. I'm sorry, that this happens but I hope you understand me and support me after all."

I feel really bad, so I try to interact a bit with the sad fans to cheer them up and end my first and last own vlive.

As kun arrives back I tell him about the news and he tries to comfort me, with food of course and we end up watching a horror movie together.

"Are you here renjun? Can I borrow your..." i walk into the living room, definitely my most favourite in this apartment, to borrow a phone charger and as lucky as I am I stumble directly in a vlive of some of the guys.

The problem is, nobody knows where I currently am, but it's too late now.

"I'm sorry guys, I didn't expect you to do this right now." I chuckle nervously "guess I gotta go..."

"oh no, you can stay, that would be pretty funny!" Chenle suggests grinning and the other join his wish.

I really don't want to.

"Sure why not."

I let Lucas pull me on a free space between them and regret my stupid decision immediately.

Comments are floating in, wondering what I'm doing here and asking random questions and I feel bad that I interrupted their video and everything is now about me.

"Gosh, I forgot I have an important appointment. Apparently I have to go, see you when else!"

And I leave the room, to escape from this awkward situation. Of course I don't have one. Later though, but I have still hours until then.