Behind Every Regret (The Untold Tales Series #1)

30 | Lost

I just stared at them for a couple of minutes. None of us talked. Pinagtitinginan na kami ng ibang pasyente at ibang staff na dumaraan sa lobby.

I wish our baby will be a girl.

Our baby.

These were Andrea's exact words.

When realizations hit me, I ran as fast I could. I heard Kean calling me from behind but I didn't look back.

He cheated on me.

He got his ex pregnant.

He promised me that he won't hurt me because it will surely hurt him too.

He told me that I was the one he's going to marry, that I was the person he wishes to spend his lifetime with.

Mahigit isang taon. Ganoon lang ba kadaling itapon iyon? Was he cheating on me all along? Does he never meant every single promise he made to me?

Is Andrea that worthy that he threw our plans for the future, his plans for the woman he claims he loves?

Those were the thoughts in my head. My vision is blurry because of the tears falling from my eyes and I can feel my knees becoming weak. Nadapa ako dahil sa heels na suot ko. I had no strength to stand up.

"Kylie," I heard his voice after a few minutes. He followed me here. If he really loves me, why did he hurt me? I'd like to ask that question but I knew the answer is too much for me to bear. Hinawi ko ang kamay niyang nakahawak sa akin.

"Don't touch me!" I shouted when he attempted to carry me.

"Please, baby," his tears started to fall from his eyes.

You can never really know people. He was like this, crying in front of me, telling me the other day that he don't want to lose me, promising me that I was the only one he loves, but he still cheated on me.

"You cheated on me," he didn't talk. Nasa parking lot kami at walang tao. I was still on the ground and he was kneeling beside me. "You got someone pregnant," I said in between my cries.

"Pakinggan mo ako, Kylie, please I love you," I shooked my head in disbelief. How could he say he loves me when he got someone else pregnant!

"What's there to hear, Kean!" I shouted. I acted on what I'm feeling and I don't care about the words coming out of my mouth.

"At least let me explain," will he explain to me how he got her pregnant?

I used all the strength left in me to stand up. I wiped my tears from me eyes. I don't need his explanation.

He cheated on me and that's the only truth I will believe in.

"This is the end of us. You will never get to see this baby, your baby. That's the prize for what you did," I said then I turned around. Nanginginig ang katawan ko habang sinasabi ko iyon. My child will grow up without a father. My child will grow up in a broken family.

Naglakad ako papalayo. He called my name one last time but I didn't look back because if I did, I knew I will forgive him and get back to him without thinking of the consequences.

I touched my stomach.

"I'm sorry, baby, don't worry maraming nagmamahal sa'yo," I whispered as if my baby would hear me.

Kean.

How can he do that to me?

I thought I was doing the right thing all along. I love him in ways I thought was right. I love him without any conditions. I love him so much. But are they not enough?

When did I stop being enough?

Naisip niya ba ako noong ginawa nila iyon ni Andrea? Naisip niya ba na mawawala ako sa kanya noong ginawa nila iyon? Did I cross his mind or was he that happy because he was reunited with her again?

I am pregnant with his baby. If I told him earlier that he will become a father, will he not cheat on me? So many what ifs clouded my mind.

What ifs. They really are the worst things.

We won't be able to fulfill our dream of becoming a family.

I want to hate him for what he did. He made me feel worthless. He made feel stupid. He made me feel I wasn't enough.  But I couldn't because I love him. I love him so much.

I was crossing the street when everything went black.

"Mommy come here, let's open the gifts!" a little girl shouted. She was beside the Christmas tree wearing a red dress and a santa hat. She looks so cute in her outfit. I was about to walk towards her when a woman spoke.

"Wait, baby, call daddy for now," the woman said.

Nagulat ako dahil may pagkakahawig siya sa akin. Or should I say I really look like her.

"Baby!" a man, who looks like someone I know, entered the living room.

"Hey there, mommy," he walked towards the woman I looked like and gave her a kiss tapos lumapit silang dalawa roon sa bata.

They were so happy opening the gifts under the christmas tree. They took pictures together and ate when the clocked striked at 12.

A complete and happy family.

I slowly opened my eyes. Nagulat ako dahil kulay puti lang ang nakikita ko. There were alse machine connected to my body. I turned to my left and I saw a man reading a book.

"Finally, you're awake! I'll call the nurse," he said.

"Kuya," I said in weak voice because I do not have the strength to speak. "Why am I here?"

Instead of answering, he got out of the room and when he returned, there were two nurses.

They examined me and left the room when they assured that I was fine. I closed my eyes. Why do I feel so empty?

I suddenly remembered why I was here.

"Kuya," I called him again then he looked at me with sad eyes.

"Where's my baby?" tears started to fall from eyes. I don't want to here his answer.

"Kylie, take a rest,"

"Kuya!" I shouted. "I asked where my baby is! Why do I feel like he's not here with me?" nurses came in when they heard my scream.

"Where's my baby?" I asked in loud voice. None of them answered. Even the doctor failed to utter a word.

"Please," I whispered because I feel so tired inside.

"You got into an accident," panimula ni Kuya. Tumingin ako sa kanya na hindi alam ang mararamdaman.

Flashbacks of what happened that day rushed into my mind.

Seeing Kean at the OB with Andrea.

Finding out that he got someone else pregnant.

Telling him that we're over.

"My baby," I cried while touching my stomach.

"You were unconscious for three days, Ms. Rivera. We did everything but we couldn't save your baby, we are sorry," the doctor said tapos lumabas sila.

I lost Kean then I lost our baby.

I don't know how I will continue with my life.