Planning Your Future

Still Hurting

November 25, 1991

Veronica's POV

We pull up to Jill's house. I'm still staring at my scar as I've been doing since we started driving. When I first noticed it a few weeks ago, I realized I'll have see that every time I wear a bathing suit or just a bra. But now I just find myself tracing it with my finger. JD loudly sighs, breaking me from my trance. "What is it?" I look up. He's looking at Heather's car. "I don't get what's so bad about Heather becoming your step sister." I shake my head. "It's just weird." He shrugs. "Well if she's your step sister, she has to let go of her feelings for you." I tell him. He's quiet for a little bit. "True." He gets out and gets our stuff from the trunk.

Heather beams when she sees me. "Hey! How are you? I heard about the shooting." She hugs me. When we let go she smiles at JD. "Hey, so it's crazy that we'll be-" JD is interrupted by Jill clearing her throat loudly. "Why don't I help you two get settled." Jill brings us upstairs into JD's room. "Don't say anything to her about it. We haven't told anyone. I only told you because of what happened with Veronica. So stay quiet until we break the news tonight. And act surprised, will you?" She leaves, patting my shoulder. "So now I have to suffer her subtle flirting for a few more hours." He sighs. I hear a car door open and shut. I look out to window, "James is here so you won't have to." I walk out of the room. I get downstairs as James is walking in. Heather hugs him and kisses him on the cheek. I give him a hug as well.

We all sit and talk, Heather giving JD looks the whole time. When I look at JD, he seems very uncomfortable. Finally dinner arrives. Jill and Hank get our attention. "Jason, Heather, even Veronica and James. We have a big announcement for you. Hank and I-" Jill holds up her hand with the ring, "are getting married." Heather gasps. I kick JD so he'll react. "Wow! That's amazing." He tries to act surprised. I smile, "I'm so happy for you!" I give JD a look to make sure he knows that he did a terrible job acting surprised. Heather hugs Jill and her dad. Then she looks at JD with a smile.

After dinner, Heather and I sit on the back porch. "So how are you doing after what happened?" She asks. "I'm okay. I still get a lot of flashbacks. And I freak out when someone even touches my upper arm." A couple of weeks ago, a cashier grabbed my arm after I forgot one of my bags. I freaked out and had a panic attack in a store. "Have you thought about seeing someone?" Heather asks. "Like a shrink?" I laugh. "Yeah. I'm taking a psychology class. You clearly have PTSD." She is about to touch my arm but decides to place her hand on my back. "I'll think about it." I get up.

The next morning I go to the prison. Duke looks concerned when she comes out. "Hey are you okay? I heard about what happened." I raise my eyebrows. "How did you hear?" I doubt anyone in prison would be able to watch the news in here. "Heather told me. She came to visit me after it happened. So are you okay?" She asks. "Yeah, I'm fine. I've been getting flashbacks but it isn't too bad." I assure her. "Have you thought of talking to a therapist about it?" I sigh,  "Heather said the same thing. I told her I'd think about it." She clearly gives up on saying anything else about it. "So how are you?" I try to change the subject. "Same old prison stuff." I laugh, "Yeah I bet it's boring." She nods.

"Veronica, you know you don't have to put on a brave face, right?" She asks suddenly. "What?" I thought we dropped this. "I'm really fine." I say. "I can see you're still hurting and you need to see that that's okay." She's making a face that shows she cares a lot. "I'm really okay. Now I have to go have lunch with my dad. Bye Heather." I put the phone back on the hook and leave.

I stop by JD's to change before lunch. I walk in with a face that shows my distaste for that visit. "Hey, what's wrong?" JD asks. I ignore him and continue upstairs. While I pick out my dress, I think back to what Heather said. Soon I realize that I'm starting to cry. Now my mind is flooded with all the trauma Aaron put me through. JD walks in. "Veronica, why are you crying?" He pulls me into his arms as I begin sobbing. "Heather was right. I am still hurting. What he did to me still haunts me and I can't stop thinking about it."

After I calm down, I quickly fix my makeup and put on the dress I had picked out. I leave while JD is in the kitchen. I drive to the restaurant my dad had picked. I walk and and look for my dad. I see him waving so I go over. We hug before I sit down.

"How are you?" He asks. "I'm good. Just excited to be back for Thanksgiving. Speaking of which, what are you doing Thursday?" I doubt he has plans since him and my mother are no longer together. "Nothing. Why?" He questions as he looks at the menu. "Heather M's family is coming over to eat with us and I was wondering if you wanted to come too." I shrug. "Of course." He smiles. "But why is Heather's family coming?" He sets the menu down. "Oh, Jill and Heather's dad are engaged." He laughs, "Wow! I'm happy for them."

After lunch, I hug my dad and head back to JD's. "The kids are in the back." Jill tells me. I nod and go to the backyard. They are talking until they see me. "Hey! I didn't even hear you leave. How was lunch with your dad?" JD asks. "Good." I sit beside him. "So JD told me you saw Heather today..." Heather states, sounding like she has more to say. "I did. She's doing pretty good." I shrug.

"So how are you feeling about your dad and JD's mom?" Heather looks scared by my question. "It's great! I'm super happy for them!" She smiles. I notice her glance at JD. I feel JD squirm beside me. I grab JD's hand which causes her to look away. I don't know if James notices what's happening but he seems like he might. "I'm going to run to the bathroom." I get up and walk inside. After I'm done, I open the door where James is waiting. "Oh... Do you need to use the-" He interrupts me. "I think you know what's happening with JD and Heather." I'm shocked. "Yeah. It's uncomfortable. JD wasn't excited to come because of it." I cross my arms. "I'm considering ending it. Is that bad?" He asks nervously. "No. I get it. I mean... JD's been trying to get her to stop having feelings for him for two years. It's gotta be hard not being the one she has those feelings for. Do what you have to. Just-" I set a hand on his shoulder. "Wait until after this week. Just get through this week then do what you have to." I smile at him. We go back outside and enjoy the rest of the day. James and I continue to give each other looks every time Heather gives JD those longing looks. This week will be interesting.

Sorry about the wait! Life got crazy and I was struggling to get the creative juices flowing. But I hope you enjoyed this chapter! I'll try to be more consistent!